It seems that Russian president Vladimir Putin has finally figured out what every middle-school boy has known since the '90's: if you play Boyz II Men for your date, it all but guarantees that her clothes are comin' off.
parttimemusic via Wikipedia
In a bid to astronomically increase the Russian birth rate, president Putin has hired the '90s ballad-crooning trio known for "End of the Road" and "I'll Make Love to You" to entice his citizens into gettin' it on. It's the right choice if you ask me, considering I believe their music is directly responsible for one in three American births during the early 1990s.
As silly as it sounds, I really feel like Putin may have hit the nail on the head with this one. I'm glad he's stopped the whole "trying to pay the citizens of Russia to have babies" thing; it was a little desperate. Women like it when you drive a hard bargain, offering nothing more than a little vodka and some ambiance. I mean, why pay for it, when all it takes is a little mood music to seal the deal?
In a slow-clap to his creativity, I'd like to offer a few song suggestions to Mr. Putin to help increase the odds of this weird, nationwide naughty-bits marathon succeeding. I'm helpful like that.