My Girlfriend Calls Me Too Much. Help!
Welcome to Ask Willie D, Rocks Off's advice column where the Geto Boys MC answers reader questions about matters, in his own words, "funny, serious or unpredictable." Something on your mind? Ask Willie D!
Dear Willie D:
My boyfriend of two years told me that he was moving away to attend college. When I told him I was going to try to get into the same school, he told me it was a bad idea. When I asked him why, he just danced around the issue, saying that we wouldn't be able to concentrate on our studies because we would be together all of the time. I don't understand. We're together all the time now and both of us make good grades.
We are seniors about to graduate. I'm an old-fashioned girl who believes in growing old with the man I love. Regardless of the obstacles you face, you find a way to stay together no matter what. But his actions are making me nervous. I'm thinking maybe it has something to do with the fact that we are of two zodiac signs that aren't supposed to get alone: he's a Capricorn, and I'm an Aquarius.
Is it possible that our relationship won't work because of our incompatible astrology elements?
First of all, young lady, you have your whole life in front of you. Give your boyfriend his space, and let him attend college alone. If it's meant to be, the distance won't change your relationship status.
Secondly, don't believe that astrology s---. Horoscopes are fun to read, and to use as a conversation piece, but they are so broad in range that they can be applied to almost anyone at any given time. No one knows what the future holds. As Marvin Gaye once said, "There's only three things that's for sure: taxes, death and trouble -- this I know."
MY GIRLFRIEND CALLS ME TOO MUCH
Dear Willie D:
Next week will commemorate eight months that I have been dating my girlfriend. Until a few days ago we lived in separate households, so we spent quite a bit of time talking on the phone. She works the night shift for a rental-car company located at the airport. Because it's generally slow, she has a lot of free time on her hands, which she uses to call me.
I love talking to her, but I work the late shift also, and I don't have all the free time she does. I'm a tow-truck driver, and I work one of the busiest highways in Chicago. The other day she called me three times within 20 minutes so I got angry, and said some things about her being clingy. After she got upset, I apologized and recanted, but I really meant what I said.
I don't have the time to talk to her all day, but by the same token I'm trying to be there for her by keeping an open line of communication. How can I get her to bring down her call volume without tuning me out?
All Talked Out:
Sometimes when people don't have anything to do they assume neither do you, so have to have a candid discussion with your girlfriend, and tell her how you feel. You don't have to tell her that she calls you too much; just tell her you'll call her when you get a minute, or when you take a break. Be considerate of her feelings. Let her know that you don't like talking to her when you're busy because you can't give her your undivided attention.
Whatever you do don't make her feel that you don't appreciate her calls because if she stops calling to talk to you she will start calling to talk to someone else. All things considered, that someone else is not going to mind her calling him three times within 20 minutes; at least not until he gets her to take her clothes off.
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