I Have Trouble Talking to the Ladies. Help!
Welcome to Ask Willie D, Rocks Off's advice column where the Geto Boys MC answers reader questions about matters, in his own words, "funny, serious or unpredictable." Something on your mind? Ask Willie D!
Dear Willie D:
Never in my life have I ever wanted kids. After growing up in an abusive household -- due to mental illness -- I always joked that the crazy genetics of my family would end right at my womb. I have worked extremely hard to get past growing up that way and live a normal life.
I was always terrified of having a child because I knew firsthand what a bad parent could do to a kid. In middle school, when other girls were figuring out what kind of clothes and boys were cute, I was dealing with suicide attempts and trying to figure out how to leave my home for good. But now there is my man. We have been together for a long time and it is undeniable that he is going to be an amazing father. He is patient, creative, and loving.
He makes me think about how much I want to raise a child with him, and together we could be the parents I never had. I often find myself daydreaming about it. But I feel like my genetics would be like dumping toxic waste onto a pristine landscape. People have been trying to study the nature versus nurture argument for decades, and I still don't think we have any definitive proof.
I also feel strongly that helping a displaced child have a happy, healthy life is the right thing to do. Only I worry that all of my reservations are selfish and that maybe the age-old importance of passing on genetics would mean more to my partner than I think. It is an issue that I know we will be talking about, but I'm curious about another man's opinion on the matter: is it wrong to deny a man a biological child just because of fears about passing on genetic problems?
While growing up, because of the lack of love and abundance of dissension in our home, my oldest brother Warren used to tell me our family was cursed. While I wasn't convinced, his words did make me wonder. Still, my desire to have my own biological kids and break the cycle was stronger than any fears or opposition. I don't know your man but if he is like most men; if possible, he will want his own blood running through his child's veins.
It's noble of you to want to give a displaced child a loving home and not bring a child who might be genetically predisposed to mental illness into this already crazy world. But to use your own words, you haven't given me any definitive proof that your child will be mentally challenged.
You seem like the type of woman who would make an excellent mother and your man appears to be capable of being a great father. Nature is the strongest force known to men. But nothing develops to its full potential without proper nurturing.
I THINK I MIGHT BE A PSYCHIC
Dear Willie D:
I have visions of things happening and they happen. I sensed that my brother was in some form of danger involving a vehicle, and the next week he was in a bad accident. Physically he was okay but he totaled his car. I can tell when a friend is depressed without seeing or speaking to her. When I call to tell her everything is going to be fine, she usually cries or asks me how did I know?
I have premonitions of children being born all the time. I can see a pregnant woman in public and tell her the gender of her baby without knowing anything about her. Whenever my second sight kicks in, I know something is happening because my vision and smell sensory increases exponentially and my taste buds become acute. My friends think I'm blessed to have this gift but I see it as more of a curse.
I don't like feeling all of these emotions but I can't control them. What do you think I should do?
I tend to believe that all of us have various degrees of a sixth sense or second sight. They're disguised as hunches, instincts and intuition. I'm not a believer in paranormal abilities, but if I had the foresight to predict the future I think I would embrace it.
If you truly believe you have psychic powers and don't like the feeling; since you can't control your emotions maybe you should see a psychic. No, really; I hear they're pretty good at guiding energy. When you get a chance, ask for the winning numbers to this week's lottery for me. If I win I'll split it with you.
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