The Top Five Stunt Queen Antics From Last Night's MTV VMAs
3. Miley using a giant foam finger as a naughty prop, and her penchant for mimicking a lizard.
No matter what anyone tells you, a giant foam finger is not the way to come off as alluring, or sexy, or even edgy. It's kind of weird, and not terribly enticing, even if you rub your crotch with it a thousand and six times. Just take Miley as a warning against the dangers of naughtying up a foam finger as an example. Even Drake looked bored. Not only that, but it's about time for that tongue to go back into the depths from which it came.
2. One Direction receiving the "Song of the Summer" award.
One Direction's song isn't terrible, per se, but it's hard to understand why it won when placed in a category against actual artists like Ellie Goulding, who can sing her pretty little ass off. It's all confusing and made us genuinely feel very old. Perhaps it's that 10:30 p.m. is well past our bedtime, and we were distracted from trying to get those damn kids off our lawn, but we just felt that the song of the summer should have been one that people would actually want to listen to.