Houston's Top 10 Bro Bars, Clubs & Ice Houses

As our sister blog Eating...Our Words does, from time to time Rocks Off will be giving your our picks for the top taverns in various Houston-area neighborhoods. Of course, the lines can be porous, but here anything with a TABC license that cannot reasonably be considered either a restaurant, coffeehouse or live-music venue is fair game.

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We like bros, with their muscley-muscles and their tight rhinestoned tees; they make for great memes and they keep the hair gel industry in business, so for that, we're thankful. Without them, the Axe-scented breezes that drift across the city on Sunday-brunch days would be sorely missed.

So we say keep on doin' your thing, bros. Fist-pumping is rad.


10. ROYAL OAK BAR & GRILL

No, not all of our bro bars are straight off the Washington drag. That would have been way too easy. This bar, although it is more of a Washington-esque type of scene, is situated near Montrose places like Anvil and Catbirds, yet the vibe is way different.

There's an expensive valet, lots of Affliction shirts, and plenty of Jager a-flowin'. This place is a frat party disguised as a bar. It's debauchery at its finest, with an ass-to-elbows crowd fist-pumping to the near-deafening music. Oh, and bro... do they even lift?

1318 Westheimer, 281-974-4752, royaloakhouston.com

REWIND:

Houston's Top 10 Hipster Bars, Clubs & Ice Houses


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9. OTC PATIO BAR
There are ping-pong tables lined up by the bathroom, life-size four-square, luxury portapotties to ease those long bathroom lines, and steaks grillin' outside at this open-air establishment, which helps to draw in the bros like moths to the Ed Hardy flame. There's so much spray-tan and muscle in this place that it's like a sea of hair gel.

The beer selection is a bit lacking, but no worries; there are plenty of shots, shots, shots, shot, shots shots, e'rybooooody!

3212 Kirby, 713-489-0860


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8. BRIXX
This place is Jersey Shore tans and enhanced figures at their finest; Brixx is the place to come when you need to get that college-kid grindin' on. There's plenty of hip-hop to get those fists a-pumpin', and rumor has it that the bathroom attendants stock plenty of body glitter in case you forgot yours.

Seriously, though. Brixx welcomes graphic tees with open arms, so feel free to throw on your blingiest, shiniest finery over that massive chest and roll on up to the velvet ropes. They'll help you get your workout on.

5110 Washington, 713-864-8811, brixxhouston.com

Location Info

Map

Roak On Kirby - CLOSED

3320 Kirby, Houston, TX

Category: Music

Wonder Bar

2416 Brazos, Houston, TX

Category: Music

Kung Fu Saloon

5317 Washington, Houston, TX

Category: Music

Roosevelt Lounge

5219 Washington, Houston, TX

Category: Music

Hughes Hangar

2811 Washington, Houston, TX

Category: Music

The Midtown Drinkery Bar & Grill

2416 Brazos, Houston, TX

Category: Music

The Washington Avenue Drinkery

4115 Washington, Houston, TX

Category: Music

Brixx

5110 Washington, Houston, TX

Category: Music

OTC Patio Bar

3212 Kirby Drive, Houston, TX

Category: Music

Royal Oak Bar & Grill

1318 Westheimer Road, Houston, TX

Category: Music


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23 comments
WhiteLightning
WhiteLightning

Never been to one of these, never will. Live across from Royal Oak. If it caught fire, I wouldn't let them use my water hydrant.

blackrain35
blackrain35

Most of them on Washington Ave. Must top 10 for the younger crowd. Never been to or heard of either one of these.

Brian Long
Brian Long

They have a special for ladies every night and its BYOB. Bring Your Own BroBag!

Brian Long
Brian Long

I think you failed to mention that Proof Bar and Patio is at least in the top 5 BroBag in Houston! Yes BroBag is my word ! I changed its number 1 !

kellogg.45
kellogg.45

Haven't heard of them, highly doubt I will go to any of them.

Danielle Quinn
Danielle Quinn

Top 10 Places to stay away from if you aren't a gross "bro"

Steven Perry
Steven Perry

These are all those places I keep hearing about, but never seem to find myself in... ever.

_sid.
_sid.

Did you write this in 1996, havnt seen an affliction or ed hardy shirt in years. all else true.

BillCompton
BillCompton

Way to stick it to them! you are so cool and counter culture and edgy! 

texmex01
texmex01 topcommenter

Douchbags and Hipsters are in the same category....

CR250
CR250

Bro's??? You mean Douche Bags dont you?

Schittphaiç Magü
Schittphaiç Magü

Houston's Top 10 Bars, Clubs, and Ice Houses to Avoid If You Have Any Dignity, Whatsoever.

Kandace Lytle
Kandace Lytle

Good Job, but I think Hughes Hangar depends on the night you are there. The rest on the list, I avoid completely!

RedIsNotADrink
RedIsNotADrink

@Evan Mintz Oh and for the latin peeps, Escapade 2001 and 2006 on 59N...Ed Hardy and company is just catching on as the new clothing line. 

RedIsNotADrink
RedIsNotADrink

@Evan Mintz Any Sherlock's or Baker St Pub, Hooters, Fox & Hound & Twin Peaks, any Molly's Pub. ...all ful of Brolicious Babes. 

h_e_x
h_e_x

@Sean Jmesun Where men go to get fitted for bros, or manziers if you will.

RedIsNotADrink
RedIsNotADrink

@Kandace Lytle True. I find that Latin night and Fridays brings in a good crowd...for Washington Ave

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