Free Press Summer Fest: The Festival's Biggest WTF Moments

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Photo by Jim Bricker
A little lost, Kim?
Know Your City
During Matt & Kim, Kim had the crowd in her pocket... until she accidentally called them "Dallas." She immediately recognized her terrible faux pas and recovered by telling a story about how once she was having sex with Matt and called him by the wrong name. She said that afterwards "things got weird," so she encouraged the crowd to get as "weird" as they could so we could all relive it together. Crisis averted. SELENA DIERINGER


Make-Out Party
While I was smack in the middle of the mob at Calvin Harris, I looked around and realized that everyone around me was making out, hard. It's really awkward to be standing with a co-worker in the middle of a mob of high-school kids, all of them making out while the area reeked of sweat and dance music was blaring. Kids, we don't need to see you dry-hump, like, ever. ANGELICA LEICHT

REWIND:

Free Press Summer Fest: The Worst Things Inflicted Upon Us, 2013

Free Press Summer Fest: The Best Acts of Sunday, 6/2/2013


The Good Old Days?
The most "WTF" thing that I encountered at the fest was the almost total lack of WTF-ness, at least compared to previous years. The lines to get in were manageable, the number of porta-cans was appropriate and, for the most part, everything ran on schedule.

Not bad for 80,000 people, I guess, but I found myself pining for the weirdness of last year's Super Happy Fun Land stage - or even a paint slide or two. NATHAN SMITH


Back That Ass Up
Women, I'd like to talk to you about a serious problem sweeping America. It's called "Momjeans Jeanshorts," and it is a legit epidemic. I've gotta tell you straight, they don't look good on ANYONE. Heidi Klum would look awkward in that shit.

They make everyone look like they have a big ass, and NOT in the good, "Back That Ass Up" way. There was never a rock song about pear-bottomed girls making the rockin' world go 'round. I'm all for a high-waisted sailor pant, because that shit is cute. These shorts are NOT. I say we band together and make this trend disappear as fast as possible. SELENA DIERINGER


Let It Grow
As I was walking between stages Sunday afternoon, someone - who did this all without stopping his forward momentum, I might add - reached out, stroked my facial hair, looked me in the eye and said, "Let it grow, man, let it grow."

What he doesn't know is that I've tried growing it for years and no matter what I do, it just stops at a certain, short point. Way to remind me I'll never have a magnificent beard, random jerk. CORY GARCIA

REWIND:

Macklemore & Ryan Lewis at Free Press Summer Fest, 6/2/2013

Free Press Summer Fest: Saturday's Best Acts, 6/1/2013


Not So Fancy Pants
The Fancy Pants tents were full of people flat laid out from the sun, but one chick in there Saturday was so out of it that she wouldn't wake up or eat. The people around her were trying to help her, but no dice.

She eventually was forced up and at 'em by some dude, and followed him out. I'm really hoping it was someone she came with. ANGELICA LEICHT


High On the Hill
There was a giant dirt cliff on the hill in front of the Saturn stage, I sat there during Vintage Trouble, watching people struggle to overcome it. That was entertaining. And Sunday's rain made those hills even more slippery. BRITTANIE SHEY


Being The "Cool" Parent
I get it- you want to go have fun at FPSF and don't want to fork over the cash for a babysitter, so you gather up your youngster(s) at hit the festival. Sure, in 10 years your kids will be thanking you for exposing them to good music at a young age, but come one: if you're kid can't be trusted to be home alone for the afternoon, does that same kid need to be watching the Geto Boys? CORY GARCIA


Give Us the Straight Dope
So, did we ever find out if Bushwick Bill really did get busted for pot possession? We'd kind of like to know. [The latest we've heard is that he was simply late coming in from Louisiana -- Ed.] JOHN SEABORN GRAY

Location Info

Map

Eleanor Tinsley Park

500 Allen Parkway, Houston, TX

Category: General


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13 comments
Sean Jmesun
Sean Jmesun

Mine would be how it went from 30 dollars to 180 in like 2years

dermgerm
dermgerm

the momjean jeanshorts kill my soul

the flat teardrop butt just ain't pretty

pancake
pancake

NATHAN, SHFL tried to bring the weird with an open mic puppet booth/trailer.  It was just a little hard to find because it was off at one of the ends of the grounds and not advertised on any of the maps, website, etc.  Admittedly, the festival has been increasingly discouraging of anything too chaotic which is the SHFL stock and trade.

Scott Crain
Scott Crain

I agree with Jason, chill out HP. Put on your own music fest if you had such a horrible time.

Nancy Rosas
Nancy Rosas

Which was fine, but sometimes it was cooler outside than in. I'm doing GA next year.

Candice Pauley
Candice Pauley

The only perk I really saw was the tent access. I agree, not a lot more for the extra cash.

Nancy Rosas
Nancy Rosas

Lol the dirt hill was sketchy. Also, does anyone else not understand what was so fancy about Fancy Pants? I don't feel like I got any real perks from it. Had a blast, however.

Jason McElweenie
Jason McElweenie

Some of these are the same as the previous story. Also, when did HP become a place for whiny hipster 'journalists' a la Buzzfeed? Complaining because people brought their kids?

Jeff Hunter
Jeff Hunter

Seeing a flickering message on the screen before TV on the Radio that said "Drink" "More" "Beer" "Now"... this is what Budweiser relies on...

Joshua Adam Hunt
Joshua Adam Hunt

Getting to the gate and discovering there is no re entry or realizing there are to many people for for so few port I cans,

alinck84
alinck84

What was up with the hundreds of couples with the women all hippie chick and the guy dressed all 80's?

camelliac1
camelliac1

Preach On Selena!! I was wondering if anyone else thought that the early 90's called and wanted their high waisted mom jean shorts back. I know styles come back and all, but that's not cute.

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