Free Press Summer Fest: Acts We'd Rather Skip This Time

This weekend's Free Press Summer Fest at Eleanor Tinsley Park is officially (way) sold out, so our readers who don't have passes at this point are sadly now forced to test their skills at the "secondary market." For those of you who are already in, this week Rocks Off has been bringing you our staff recommendations for acts you might consider checking out while you're there. Today, however, we asked our writers to give us one FPSF act they'd gladly pass on seeing. (Note: planets correspond to FPSF stage names.)

2Chainz0531-MT.jpg
Photo by Marco Torres
2 Chainz
SATURDAY

2 Chainz
I'm still kind of hoping that 2 Chainz is listed on this year's lineup as a bad joke. Not only does he stick out like a sore thumb compared to the other artists on the bill, he's also lacking in the talent department. Maybe I'm just turning into a cranky old man, but I just don't get it. No thank you. MATTHEW KEEVER


The former Playerz Circle rapper Tity Boi, now known as 2 Chainz, has showcased his booty twerkin' anthems in Houston on at least three, maybe four occasions within the last year and a half. I've also seen him onstage at the Made In America festival in Philly and earlier this year at Coachella. I like booty music as much as the next guy, but theres no novelty to Mr. Chainz anymore. (4:30 p.m., Neptune) MARCO TORRES


Borgore
There are roughly a million EDM acts in the world, but none of them bug me as much as Borgore. Maybe it's just me being irrational, maybe it's that I don't buy in to the "gorestep" thing, or maybe I just really hate his unnecessary "Smell Yo Dick" remix. Either way, I'll save my raging for someone else. (6:10 p.m., Neptune) CORY GARCIA


Passion Pit
Part of the reason I like this year's Summer Fest lineup so much is because although it only has a couple of artists that are must-see for me, pretty much all of them are artists that I would at least be interested in seeing what they're like on a live stage.

I'm mildly apprehensive at the thought that one of my friends may try to make me sit through Passion Pit -- whose songs, as far as I'm concerned, are titled either "Sleepyhead" or "Not Sleepyhead" - but even that wouldn't be too bad an ordeal. (7:20 p.m., Mars) JOHN SEABORN GRAY


PostalService0531.jpg
Sub Pop Records
The Postal Service
Man, no offense to their fans, but I'm not sure I'm at all interested in sticking around on Saturday night after Iggy and the Stooges get done. The Postal Service is alright and all, but after the Stooges, I'll likely need two things: ice and liquor; not songs that remind me of high-school heartaches. Postal Service would have worked a lot better closing out Sunday night instead. COREY DEITERMAN


The Postal Service has never been my bag. In fact, I detest them only slightly less than the window line at the actual, y'know, Postal Service. Their soulless, mechanical bleeping and blooping I could almost deal with, if the songs weren't so damn boring.

Rock and roll shouldn't sound like a lullaby, which is the last thing I'm going to want to hear when I'm sunburnt, half-drunk and covered in grime at the end of a long, sweaty day. I'll be giving A Place to Bury Strangers a shot in that timeslot, instead. (8:50 p.m. Saturday, Saturn) NATHAN SMITH


SUNDAY

Of Monsters and Men
An act I will undoubtedly skip is Of Monsters and Men. They are the awful fusion of Mumford and Sons and Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros -- two equally loathsome bands, in my not so humble opinion. So yeah, you'll likely find me pounding a beer during that set. OK, let's be honest -- a water. (5:40 p.m., Mars) NEPH BASEDOW


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Photo by Matthew Keever
Macklemore
Macklemore & Ryan Lewis
Macklemore is a word that I really only know from Twitter. My knowledge of what exactly a Macklemore is extends from the 140 character info-dumps. I've gathered that it is a person. Maybe he is a rapper? I'm not interested enough to look it up. I just know that folks whose trust I taste use Macklemore as a punchline, and folks whose taste I find suspect are very excited that he was on a late-night show that I can't drum up enough enthusiasm to care about, either. APRIL BREM PATRICK


Judging by the name alone. It sounds like a joke my dad would make. Also, as much as I would LOVE to see Macklemore, I have a feeling the stage will be crowded with people just waiting to hear his one hit before they leave, and I don't really want to have to deal with that kind of audience vibe. (6:20 p.m., Saturn) BRITTANIE SHEY


Kitty Pryde
I admittedly can't jump on the hipster-rap bandwagon, which made my pick for this one an easy choice. However, even if I was enamored with the Kreayshawn's of the world, I'd still skip the hell out of Kitty Pryde. Her lyrics are social media-centric, her flow is monotone, and her beats are lame. She's quite likable as a person from what I've read in interviews, but I just find the rest of it to be a whiny loop of Etsy-inspired silliness. (7:20 p.m., Mercury) ANGELICA LEICHT



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27 comments
dimsum
dimsum

Like any music fest there are some good acts and some lame ones. And like any humanoid, taste is subjective. But hey critics criticize. Live with it.

borgore.
borgore.

the only reason you probably have a job is because of those 'acts you'd rather skip.' i agree that i dont want to see all of them, either, but seriously, you seem like a total moron writing this...and not an ironic, kinda hip one.

jenmartino427
jenmartino427

If there are so many acts that the people covering it detest and don't want to see, please give up a spot for those of us that didn't get tickets in time and would gladly check out the music with an open mind.

aceofspades104
aceofspades104

"Let's list all the mainstream acts we don't actually listen to and say we don't want to go to them in an attempt to look even more hipster than Free Press."

Joshua Adam Hunt
Joshua Adam Hunt

This article is lame as it is 1 persons opinion. Keep your distance from me while at the festival.

T.j. Dubz
T.j. Dubz

Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. Nobody should name anyone but them. Well done, April Brem Patrick.

thraeryn
thraeryn

ITC: Rocks Off staff are miffed that Free Press Summer Fest isn't this year's Mayhem Festival.

S'okay, I kinda am, too.

stonerbuddybongloader
stonerbuddybongloader

How about this, Houston Press::

Considering y'all are a much older rag with deeper pockets and a considerable amount of 'cred'...Instead of bashing on a rival alt paper's choices for FPSF artists, THROW A BETTER FESTIVAL WITH BETTER ARTISTS OR STFU!!!!

f*cking HTX and the damn hater mentality. 

Patrick Stevens
Patrick Stevens

I really just wanted to see Iggy, and Social D, but that much money for two bands is ridiculous. Would be like paying $140 just to see GnR or something. Oh, wait...

albertgator
albertgator

judge all music but houston music

i love this list

togepi258
togepi258

Judging music without even listening to it? That's pretty bad journalism, dude. Macklemore is actually a great artist (and this is coming from a long-time metal head). 

H_e_x
H_e_x

@aceofspades104 Isn't Kitty Pryde hipster rap though?As in no one other than hipsters listen to her because she's not bla...I mean because she's ever so cute.

H_e_x
H_e_x

@stonerbuddybongloader I love how any and all form of criticism isn't allowed in 2013. I remember people being able to criticize things in 2012, but something must have changed to make criticism invalid in 2013. No, let's hold up shitty acts for the sake of what? To champion shitty music?

stonerbuddybongloader
stonerbuddybongloader

@H_e_x @stonerbuddybongloader 


lame old response is still a lame ol response...."lets not go coz it sux...but lets do nothing to bring better acts...lets just complain..."


yeah. doesnt matter what year it is, this is still the same ol lame response.


remember criticism can be constructive. offer solutions instead of whining is all Im saying.

togepi258
togepi258

@gossamersixteen You're completely wrong there, buddy. Are you seriously talking smack to people on the internet? How old are you?

You'd think a fellow Baroness fan would be less of an asshole.

gossamersixteen
gossamersixteen topcommenter

@togepi258 Hold tight bro, I wasn't even referring to you. That was directed at the author of this list, and was in agreement with you.. Sorry that wasn't more clear to you. Peace.

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