Abandon All Hope: Your Guide to the 2013 Grammy Award Underdogs

Taylor Swift = not an underdog, no matter what face she makes.
There are certain truths we all accept about the Grammy awards, including but not limited to: no matter how many times she's won Taylor Swift will always make that "ohmygod people like me?!?!?!" face; that NARAS president Neil Portnow will show up to make a speech that no one will remember; someone we like will lose an award they should have won.

Although we'll complain about how once again the voters dropped the ball we know that we'll be watching the show again next year secretly hoping that maybe it'll be different this time, only to be disappointed again.

How do we break this cycle of frustration?

This year instead of rooting for our favorite acts let's band together and root for those acts with no chance of winning. If they lose we knew it was coming and if they win we'll be pleasantly surprised.

Which underdogs should you root for Sunday night? Here are some suggestions.

5/4. M83, Hurry Up, We're Dreaming (Best Alternative Album)/Eric Prydz, "Midnight City (Eric Prydz Private Remix)" (Best Remixed Recording, Non-Classical)
If there is a real crime in this year's nominations, it's the lack of any nomination for the original version of M83's breakout single "Midnight City." At the core it's a victim of circumstance; the song was never mainstream enough to get a Record of the Year nomination, and there's no award for Best Alternative Song. With Fiona Apple and Gotye competing in the same category, it's unlikely the full-length will get a win here.

While the Eric Prydz remix of the track is certainly a solid jam for the festival set it has the unfortunate luck of being in the same category as a Skrillex remix. After his three wins and Best New Artist nomination last year it's hard to imagine anyone else winning this award.

3. Halestorm, "Love Bites (So Do I)" (Best Hard Rock/Metal Performance)
Although the category is only two years old, a quick look at the winners from the categories it replaced gives us two solid reasons Halestorm is unlikely to win. The first is that in the combined history of Best Metal Performance and Best Hard Rock Performance only one female-fronted group ever won (Evanescence in 2004).

The second is that it's really hard for newer bands to win Metal awards. Voters have spent the last decade handing out the Metal awards to bands that are eligible for the Rock and Roll Hall Of Fame (and Slipknot). Halestorm are just too new for their own good, which is funny because "Love Bites" is the only song nominated most people may have actually heard.

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John Cramer
John Cramer

Rogue Sideboob, Tom Araya's new side project.

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