Put a (Super Bowl) Ring On It: The Beyoncé Set List We'd Like to See
1. "If I Were a Boy"
This insipid ballad may have been a big radio hit, but it's all wrong for the Super Bowl. The Big Game is no platform for gender politics, and the song is boring to boot. Unless you want all of the men at home (and plenty of the women) to go scrambling for the remote, do not, under any circumstances sing "If I Were a Boy" at halftime.
Or ever again, if that's OK with you.
This lyrical breakup ballad has never really rung true for us. For one thing, it's too hard to imagine whatever lucky jag Beyoncé deigns to spend time with daring to treat her wrong. Seems like a single icy glare would correct that kind of behavior post-haste; a musical warning seems unnecessary. Besides, at the Super Bowl, we're looking for adulation, not admonishment. This one's a no-go.
3. "Run the World (Girls)"
We were all pretty excited when the teaser for this 2011 single hit the Web. Sadly, the song turned out to be awful. Hell, it's barely a song. It's just sort of Beyoncé screaming "Girls!" over a spare snatch of a Major Lazer sample. Let's bury it along with the rest of 4, OK? Any objections?