The 10 Worst Holiday Cover Songs Ever

Categories: Holidaze

6. dUg Pinnick, George Lynch, Billy Sheehan and Simon Phillips: "Little Drummer Boy"

"Little Drummer Boy" makes its first of two appearances on this list in this laughable pop-metal rendition. Fellow Houstonian rock nerds may instantly empathize with our main issue with this song. As a lifelong fan and apologist of King's X vocalist and bass wizard dUg Pinnick, Rocks Off can state that this "supergroup" tune may be Pinnick's worst transgression yet.

This white-washed Metal Xmas track -- complete with Sunset Strip-era background hoots and hollers -- pairs Pinnick with some of the bigger name members of Toto, Dokken, Lynch Mob and Mr. Big among other forgettable '80s-era schlock bands. Lynch Mob. Enough said.

5. The Blenders: "Pure Imagination/White Christmas"

The saccharine-smooth vocal stylings of The Blenders aren't really that bad, we suppose. But when you take a hatchet to one of the greatest Christmas songs from one of America's favorite Christmas movies (White Christmas, not Holiday Inn) and proceed to fuck with Willy Wonka while you're at it, all bets are off.

We seethed our way through the pointlessly bad "Pure Imagination" and braced for "White Christmas." Six bars in, we began to feel an uncontrollable twitch inside our right eye. By the end of the first verse, we had abandoned the concept of happiness ever returning to our life. We have no idea how long the song goes on after that, because at some point during the next verse, Rocks Off felt something hot in the back of our skull and blacked out.

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Jesus that Blenders song is depressing, it’s like spending Christmas Eve in a Holiday Inn in Parsons Kansas.

Robert Medlin
Robert Medlin

Everyone I know is getting a copy of that August Burns Red CD.

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