10 Odd Musical Gift Ideas for the Last Christmas on Earth
As Lil' Flip has repeatedly warned us, you can't truly be trill if you got no ice. That's why the rap fans on your Christmas list will be so grateful to receive this hip hopsicle ice tray for Jesus' birthday. Finally, they'll be able to keep their drank cold with ice cubes that are decidedly non-wack. The flexible rubber mold freezes water in the shapes of turntables, microphones, ghetto blasters and dollar signs, the universal symbols of hip-hop. If these cubes ain't chillin' in your gin and juice, you might as well reach for a 40, instead.
Got a pal who dreams about squeezing the clean-cut lads from One Direction between his or her thighs late at night? Give them a set of these over-sized pillowcases, and you can make that dream come true without fear of prosecution! Niall, Zayn, Liam, Harry and Louis have all been given the body-pillow treatment at last, enabling millions of fan-girls to finally drool over their idols for real. In fact, we think it may be legal to marry these things in Japan, so leave room in your budget for a wedding shower gift, too.
May be prudent to pick up a set for yourself and stash 'em away in the attic for a few years, as well. Have you seen how much that New Kids on the Block sleeping bag your mom threw out is going for on eBay these days? Just think how much these innocuous masturbation aids will be worth by the time One Direction hits the road on its first reunion tour!