Justin, Selena and Music's Top 10 Heartbreaking Split-Ups
By now, we've all had a few days to digest the awful, shocking news that North America's sweethearts, Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez, have decided to buck destiny and call it quits. We're not entirely sure how this could have happened, but Obama was just reelected. Clearly, our worst fears are already being realized.
Still, now that our bitter tears have been wiped away, we can begin to think clearly again. Justin and Selena are hardly the first recording-industry power couple to hit the skids. In many cases, artists have come out as bigger stars and better people after surviving high-profile breakups. Hell, if nothing else, we could be in store for some bitchin' breakup songs!
That, or one or both of these young superstars could fade away in depression and insanity. What do the odds say will happen? If Nate Silver has proven anything, it's that historical trend lines can sometimes help provide a peek into the future. Let's scour history's top 10 musical breakups for clues as to what may come for J-Dog and 'Lena, whaddya say?
10. Nas and Kelis
For awhile there, Nas and Kelis served as the world's great and shining hope that hip-hop relationships could really work. When they got married flashing matching grillz, it sure seemed meant to be. Sadly, it wasn't. After four years of marriage, Kelis filed for divorce amidst rumors of her hubby's infidelity.
At least the divorce helped spark some good tunes. The cover to Life Is Good, Nas' latest album, features the rap legend lost in thought, with Kelis' green wedding dress draped over his knee. The lyrics on the record are some of the heaviest and most personal of the Illmatic star's career.
9. Thurston Moore and Kim Gordon
At time when so many '90s alternative darlings are reuniting, it came as a total shock last year when Sonic Youth supercouple Thurston Moore and Kim Gordon announced that they were splitting up after 27 years of marriage. For decades, the pair had been placed on a pedestal by rock fans who dreamed of having it all: The perfect marriage, the best songs and a complete inability to sell out.
Now, that fantasy has come to an end. If Kim and Thurston couldn't make it, what hope have the rest of us aging, grungy white folk? Worst of all, the future of Sonic Youth appears to be on indefinite hold. The '90s really are over at last, it seems.
8. Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz
Frankly, it was almost a relief when Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz got divorced. They were just so young, so pretty and so happy that it threw our own shitty lives into an unsettlingly stark relief. Naturally, that just goes to show how rotten we really are inside --these two have a kid, for Christ's sake, and divorce is always devastating, no matter how rich and good-looking you may be.
For fans, the biggest bummer is that we probably don't have any classic breakup songs to look forward to from this pair. I mean, c'mon... it's Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz. Still, hope springs eternal. Never underestimate the power of lip-syncing.