5 Rock-Star Biographies That Should Be Broadway Musicals
According to Nikki Sixx, Nikki Sixx gets asked this a lot and yes, his biography The Heroin Diaries is being turned into a Broadway musical, ostensibly quenching theater fans' dire thirst for a musical based on the life of a Motley Crue member. All joking aside, this sort of thing is getting a lot of traction lately. I mean, that Tom Cruise movie, based on another rock and roll Broadway musical, did pretty well, in Tom Cruise's mind.
Let's say Broadway is just going to run with this sort of thing, as we in the entertainment industry (people like myself and Nikki Sixx) can totally just make such bold declarations regardless of whether they're actually going to happen or not.
If they do, which they will, today's Broadway producers a lot of potential memoirs from which to choose. Rock-star biographies have quickly become an accepted form of literature in the William S. Burroughs tradition of writing down all your insane drug trips and near-death experiences. It's almost hard to choose which drug-fueled rags-to-riches story to turn into a musical next, so we'll pick five for them.
Look, I wanted to stick to biographies written by the rock stars themselves... but that title. You can't tell me that you wouldn't go see a Broadway musical with that title. And Liam and Noel have had some pretty fucking crazy adventures in their time.
Liam did coke in the Queen's bathroom, that's all I should have to say to sell this.
The only problem is that the musical would have to change the ending to Liam and Noel reuniting at the end, because nobody wants to sit through the part where the brothers are embroiled in a bitter legal battle, except fans of John Grisham, and their opinions don't matter.
Unfortunately for Nikki Sixx, I think we'd all honestly rather see a musical adaptation of Tommy Lee's biography. Not only did Tommy Lee live a crazy life himself, he also had that sex tape with Pamela Anderson and let's be honest, we'd all much rather see that adapted on the Broadway stage than anything that happened in Sixx's life.
Plus, considering Lee even allows Anderson to give her own perspective in Tommyland, you could probably get Pam Anderson to co-star, for all that she's doing these days. The possibilities are much less, let us say, limited here than they are for a Sixx biography.