Gen. Petraeus: A Possible Glimpse at the Spymaster's iPod

Mike Stinson, "That's the Kind of Trouble I Need": "They said stay away, man, she'll eat you alive/ Sounds kinda fun, where do I sign?" The FBI allegedly already has a task force looking into how the general came to have an unreleased Mike Stinson track on his iPod. Stinson is cooperating with the investigation but, ever the opportunist, is rumored to be considering recutting the song as a duet with Petraeus or with a new lyric: "Paula's the kind of trouble I need."

Jerry Lee Lewis, "Home Away From Home": Unnamed sources have reported that the general was heard humming this Jerry Lee Lewis classic repeatedly during his time in Afghanistan, no doubt attracted to the utter truth of "the one time that I'm an honest man is when I come here to cheat." C'est la vie.

Paul and Paula, "Hey, Hey, Paula": The happy couple were so enamored of this old chestnut that Petraeus had his staff track down a karaoke version so he and Broadwell could sing duets. Peaches Petraeus couldn't get enough of this one. Apparently there were several things he couldn't get enough of. If only it could've been done by Peaches and Paula instead of Paul.

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