The 5 Stupidest Things Musicians Want You to Have In the Kitchen

Categories: WTF Island

Metallica Ice Pack.jpg
www.metallica.com
Earlier this week, we talked about all the stupid cookbooks that are out there either written or endorsed by celebrity musicians. For the most part, they were just endorsed because, and this gets down to the heart of the problem, musicians are musicians, not chefs. They don't know anything about cooking! Why would you buy a cookbook with a musician's face on it? That's like buying a book on do-it-yourself auto mechanics written by a banker. But I digress.

Cookbooks aren't the only stupid things musicians want to put their faces on and sell to you. Kitchenware isn't even the only stupid thing musicians want to put their faces on and sell to you, but we'll stick to the kitchenware for today. See, it's not enough to just cook the recipes they endorse. You should also use the cooking ware they endorse, as you'll soon find out.

5. Mansinthe

mansinthe_purchase.jpg
www.absinthe.de
Marilyn Manson brewed and endorsed absinthe. That about says it all, doesn't it? And really, who would possibly be surprised?

The only thing less shocking than Manson's "shock rock" antics are the ridiculous things he'll do for money and to perpetuate his image. Strangely enough, his fans will buy into it lock, stock, and barrel, no matter how ridiculous it gets.

Just as a warning, this stuff won't actually make you hallucinate or turn you into a brilliant gothic writer. That was a myth. Actually, guys like Hemingway just drank it because they were misers and absinthe was the cheapest booze you could get in Paris (where they had gone to escape Prohibition in America).

But Manson's all about the myth, so don't let this hold too much bearing in your mind.


4. Metallica Solo Cups and Ice Packs

Metallicup sept28.jpg
www.metallica.com
Having a party? Metallica's got you covered specialized black Solo cups that feature their logo on it. At only a dollar a cup, you can serve up to 50 people for the low, low price of $49.99. As an aside, are you beginning to understand those sell-out accusations Metallica got in the 90's?

Well, OK, if thinking about that price makes your head hurt, don't worry, head on over to your freezer and grab your Metallica ICE PACK. (See top.) That's right, for only $11.99 you can own a gel ice pack with "Metallica" and "Broken, Beat and Scarred" written on it. With steals like that, why would you shop for your kitchen anywhere other than the Metallica store?


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1 comments
ShutUpANDEat
ShutUpANDEat

I eagerly await the release of the Insane Clown Saucier.

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