National Punch a Hipster Day: Are You a Music Hipster?

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Today, June 1, has been declared National Punch a Hipster Day. First off, who the hell comes up with these random-ass holidays?

As someone who gets called a hipster at times, I don't think I am. Maybe I'm a music hipster, in a sense.

Most would say repeating this quote -- "I was listening to [blank] before they made it on the radio" -- is an indicator that one is a hipster. I would just consider that to be a person who knows music. I hate the radio. The radio tends to kill the songs that you love. But for mainstreamers, that apparently makes us music hipsters.

But I would like to clear some things up and provide the beef-heads with some music that may make them reconsider themselves as "hipsters."

Reconsider yourself if...

1. To all you frat bros: Dubstep and all the other genres of electronic music were an underground scene in America for a long time, but now it is making a rise. So remember when you're blasting "Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites" by Skrillex, we techno "hipsters" were listening to that when the EP was released around two years ago.


2. Nice to see everyone now enjoys The Black Keys, but just because they were featured in every March Madness 2012 commercial doesn't give you college-sports fanatics a right to start downloading the Keys' most recent album, El Camino, and then want to pick on the "hipster" who knew of The Black Keys when they were formed in Ohio in 2001.


3. I don't know what some people's obsession with wanting to learn how to play the banjo is, but could that possibly have anything to do with Mumford & Sons? Their album, Sigh No More, was released in 2009, but didn't gain popularity in the U.S. until 2010 and '11, when the band was Grammy-nominated for Best New Artist and Best Rock Song. They did start in the UK, y'all. In 2007, but that's all right.


4. It's okay if you're trying to become a musician right now. Join a DJ crew or create a band that has to have at least six members or more, like Arcade Fire. Q: Heck, no one has done it before, right? A: Wrong.

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Now these are just some examples. I'm sure there are many more you could toss out there. And feel free to.

I guess I'm trying to put this in a simpler format. We knew music before you, and that's okay. So instead of smashing our heads into the ground, may I suggest that it is okay for you participants in this pathetic national holiday to be jealous. Reconsider punching a hipster, because you may have just fallen under the spell of the same musical flavors.

To the beef-heads: It is all right if you like the same music as us. It's good!

No shit. But when someone repeats the musical hipster quote of "I knew this like two years ago," just accept it and try to catch up.

But for us musical hipsters, if you'd prefer not to get smashed in the head by those who do actually treat this as an occasion to punch a hipster, then maybe cut off on the corrections to those mainstreamers and just steer clear for today.



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20 comments
Skream
Skream

Fucking shit.... Skrillex is neither dubstep nor techno you dumbass mainstream bitch

Atroposchord
Atroposchord

So, I have a friend that moved away and became a hipster.  Let me describe what a conversation with him is like and you'll see why hipsters get punched:

Someone:  I saw a guy do a cool thing with a kazoo at a show last nightHipster:  Thats nothing.  Two weeks ago I saw a guy play a whole SHOW, with a Kazoo....using only his ASS...  You wouldn't hear about it though because it was just he and I in his garage.  It had to be better than the show you saw, even though I have no idea what that show was.  My Kazoo ass guy doesn't interest me anymore though, because someone else apparently heard him before me, so he can't possibly be that cool.  

cuppanoodles
cuppanoodles

I was one of those musical hipsters described in this article about ten years ago. If I could, I'd punch my former self in the face now. I've realized that cherishing memories of music is better and more important than trying to best other people's sense of authority and trend predicting acumen.

HipsterApproved
HipsterApproved

No one is going to admit to being a Hipster.The whole 'Holiday' thing is stupid.

Thenonymous
Thenonymous

Hipsters were better before the internet ruined them.

REGISTERED TROUT
REGISTERED TROUT

Do you guys ever feel like your aesthetic tastes just don't make you a complete person? I mean everytime I blog about my favorite bands I start to feel closer to my authentic self, but then the void creeps in and I think, 'My god what if this doesn't add up? What am I then? An empty shell of a band t-shirt?' Being a gatekeeper to good culture is so hard, especially when all these consumers of bad culture go around calling me a hipster! Back to the river I go, where there's only trout music and no one complains. 

J.B. Jones
J.B. Jones

Yeah, this is why people hate hipsters. Its not that we were listening to things before they were popular, its that we brag about them with this unearned sense of pride. Its not that you've heard so-and-so before they were big. Its that you say it and no one really gives a shit, you know? 

John Seaborn Gray
John Seaborn Gray

Looks like tomorrow will also be Counterpunch an Asshole Who Tragically Mis-Diagnosed You Day.

An333d
An333d

Yah gotta agree with the poster below no one likes a know it all. See the problem people have with and specifically music hipsters is not their knowledge but them waves it in front of everyone like they are better then everyone!

Championshipvinyl73
Championshipvinyl73

the rest of the calandar should be devoted to "punch a Nickelback/Creed/Theory of a Douchebag/Hinder fan" day. I'll stand up as a music hipster, so bring it. I owned BRMC 8 years ago before their songs were in Smirnoff Ice commercials. and Black Angels before Cadillac commercials. It's not as much a point of pride as someone put it as a statement of fact. I grew so fucking tired of radio bullshit I just started buying music I had never heard of, reading about their influences, and branching out into those bands as well. The musical nepotism of the era that I come from (90s) also made it easy to find great shit and stay away from the radio. Pearl Jam takes you to Green River and Mother Love Bone, and Mudhoney by proxy. Jawbreaker to Jets To Brazil, and from there Handsome and Helmet to Quicksand to Rival Schools. Members left one band to start or join another and put out more good shit. Hell Johnny Marr from the Smiths did an album in Modest Mouse, who was banjo-ing before Mumford was out of Jr. High. Fuck a bunch of cock-rock radio insipidly shallow and designed for mass consumption to pull chicks, give me something with substance both musically and lyrically as a B side of a 7” promo any day of the week.

JK
JK

"first originated"??

Greg L.
Greg L.

Where are you today?  I'm thinking today just became "Punch Taylor Moon Day".  The smug, self-righteous hipster...the most annoying (and most common) variation.

South West
South West

Wow. Way to go convincing us not to punch a hipster...nobody likes a know-it-all. Knowing about a musician/band before other people isn't a point of pride; it's merely chronological happenstance.

Thraeryn
Thraeryn

I prefer to think the banjo enthusiasts were saddened, yet inspired after Earl Scruggs died.  Proooooobably because I've never heard of Mumford and Sons, and that's probably because their band isn't named Iron Maiden.

John Seaborn Gray
John Seaborn Gray

Second wave trout music is so much better than the new stuff that's all been diluted with carp-punk.

Thraeryn
Thraeryn

The "I found out about them back in [X]" comment only works when you're EXCITED about the fact, kept your eyes out, got to see them live the ONLY time so far they came to town.

It's all about the difference between being happy that you get to share a cool story with someone who also shows love, and being disdainful that the other person clearly hasn't shown ENOUGH love.

yo
yo

Insecure much?

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