Remember Max Headroom?: Creepy And Stupid Christmas Videos From Holidays Past And Present
Yeah! It's almost Christmas! With each minute we are all one step closer to the day when we can stop posting lists about things pertaining to the holiday. Seriously, by the second week in December you almost type "Christmas" instead of your own name sometimes, and your brain atrophies whenever Elf comes on the television.
Here we are though with a collection of creepy music videos, featuring impossible story lines, leaps in logic, and utter delicious stupidity that can only come from big-budget Christmas music factories. You know, it takes the magic out the music when you realize most of it was probably recorded the spring or summer before it was released. For the record the only Christmas music I own - or will admit to owning to you all - is the Robert Ellis holiday EP, and Elvis' Christmas Album.
And you're right, the Futureheads, Christmas was better in the '80s...
Godless Max Headroom Celebrates Santa Claus
Max Headroom sort of scared me when I was little because he was all jittery, but it was a healthy fear, like that of fire, poison, or old people. Even the concept of what exactly Max Headroom was proved hard to understand as a child. All I know is that I had a dream that he killed my parents.
David Bowie and Bing Crosby Sing Two Different Songs
This (Seriously this was David Bowie's idea of) video has been lurking on (looking normal for mainstream audiences) Christmas video countdowns forever, and it (going on a Bing Crosby special?) doesn't get any less strange. Fun fact: Bowie is now 13 years younger than Crosby was at the time of this filming. Crosby died a month after recording the special this song was featured on, Bing Crosby's Merrie Olde Christmas, which also featured Crosby and model Twiggy teaming up for "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas".
Justin Bieber & Mariah Carey Eye Fuck Each Other In The Mall
Did you know that Bieber was eight months old to the day Mariah Carey's Merry Christmas album was released? It doesn't stop her from eyeballing his shit. Nice Nintendo 3DS placement, Beebs.