Remember Mookie Jones' P.A.N.?
Houston's history is dotted with albums that, fairly or not, have been swept aside. We'll examine them here. Have an album that you think nobody knows about but should? Email firstname.lastname@example.org.
Mookie Jones, as it were, is perfectly quixotic. He floats through the troposphere, helium-light, seemingly nary a concern held in his brain more pressing than existing as, in the case of this album, a playa-ass nigga.
He makes sounding (being?) ephemeral feel important, barely raising his voice past a whisper or his heart rate above 40 BPM. He'd eat 50 hard-boiled eggs just because 50 is a nice, round number. He is Cool Hand Luke cool.
Yallmustaforgotability: 91 percent
Why P.A.N. Is Intellectually Interesting: Because it's dedicated like a motherfucker. And what's more, it's dedicated to "being playa," which, mesmerizingly, in the sense implied here, is obliquely similar to being dedicated to nothing at all. No operational definition of "being playa" is ever given. It likely has something to do with having money and getting blowjobs.
The First Thing Said On The Album: "The royal penis is clean, your highness."
The Best Line About Being Appealing To Women That Also References A Laptop: "I could write a How to Mack book, right in my Macbook." I mean.
The Most Likely Time You'll LOL: There are lots of entertaining Mookieisms on P.A.N., the most unexpected of which is when he spurts, "Money can't buy everything? Where yo' ass been shopping at?"