Last Night: Kid Cudi & Chip Tha Ripper At Reliant Arena
6:58 p.m.: Pulling up. Holy crap. There is (what seems like) a neverending line of kids waiting to get in. Crazy. There's also a KRBE truck here. Is Kid Cudi a KRBEian now? What's happened?
7:31: The way Reliant Park has this thing set up, there are two sections here. There is a seat section and floor section. The majority of the people are on the floor section (incidentally, that's also where a majority of the stink is). Picture the coliseum in Gladiator. That's what it looks like, but instead of Russell Crowe, there are a bunch of guys in tank tops and a bunch of girls dressed like Janelle Monae. Bring out the tigers.
7:38: You know how they always play a bunch of music right before the show to try and get everyone amped up? Here, they've been playing stuff like William Bell's "I Forgot To Be Your Lover." That's cool, and almost certainly something Cudi requested. He's a curious guy.
7:39: And there are the first "CU-DI, CU-DI" chants. Neat. In the row behind me, there is a group of young teenage boys. They're here with one of the kids' father. He's wearing flip-flops and eating popcorn and drinking a margarita. The boys seem pretty excited about the show. Every time the crowd starts chanting, they do too, except instead of screaming "CU-DI, CU-DI" they shout "PE-NIS, PE-NIS." Love that.
7:41: Hey, look. Some tiny girl and her mother are here. And they're both dressed equally whoreish. That's cute. It's good to bond. Maybe they're trying to get their own episode of 16 and Pregnant?
7:43: The lights have gone off. The people have too.
7:45: The answer: "I'm scared of my lemonade tipping over." What is "Things You Hear At A Kid Cudi Show," Alex? [ding, ding, ding]
7:47: So here's a question: Does it mean anything if you're a rapper and the megamajority of your fan base is white? Like, 15 years ago, that might've been a thing. But is it now?
7:49: Cleveland rapper Chip Tha Ripper is out. He's the opening act, sure, but where are the opening acts for the opening act? Shouldn't there be a stream of dudes coming out, doing three or four songs that we've never heard before? Is this show seriously starting only 19 minutes after it was supposed to? WTH. Is this how they do things in Ohio? Shit, man. It might be time to make a move.
Chip Tha Ripper
7:54: "Light One Up." In your iPod, Chip is neat. He's a countrified Ohioan, and he almost always grabs some multilayered production. In person - or, in this venue, which is basically a gigantic aluminum can - he isn't big enough to fill the space. Started strong, starting to wane.
7:55: P.S. The chorus for "Light one Up": "Light one up, pass it, and hope that bitch make it back." That's basically the same way we take care of our sons: Get them dressed, send them outside to play, hope those bitches make it back.
8:01: Talking about how Texas rappers have learned to hunt and gather in their own areas because the rest of the country has a bias against them, Chip says something like, "Texas is the only city that supports their artists like that." City, Chip?
8:17: Ack. Man, this guy talks too much. There's a break between every song where he explains something or tries the "All my [weed smokers/pretty women/etc.] make noise" thing or mentions how he's killing it or whatev. Multiple breaks aren't cool in the middle of a show. It throws the rhythm off. It's like sex. You can't keep stopping to explain what you're doing, you just do it and hope the other person (or "people," if you're awesome) like it.