This Looks Legit: 4 Craigslist Music Ads We Passed On

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Photo by Justin Sullivan
Rocks Off likes to troll CraigsList looking for ads in the musicians section. You can often find some truly original and interesting people at the very inception of their careers. You can also find rampaging lunatics who are interesting enough to talk to.

But nyone who has spent more than an hour on CraigsList has surely learned how to tell when a post is some half-assed attempt by a shady individual or company to somehow part you with your money in exchange for also destroying your dreams and faith in the music industry. And that's the best-case scenario. The rest of the time it's people who are just utterly clueless about how incapable of delivering on their promise they really are.

In an effort to maybe guide some young bands out there, here are the kinds of things we've learned to avoid. All ads submitted as written without corrections.

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Pictured: The rapper who will buy this ad.
GET YOUR MUSIC ON MAJOR TV/FILM,HIP HOP,POP,ROCK (HOUSTON)

IF YOU SING RAP OR PRODUCE BEATS THIS COULD BE YOUR CHANCE,WE CAN GET YOUR MUSIC ON TOP TV NETWORKS,MTV,BET,BRAVO,E NETWORK,TMZ,TRU TV AND MANY MORE CALL XPOZETALENT 702-927-6028 LOCATED IN LAS VEGAS NV

Sorry for the all caps, but that's what a lot of these people think we respond to. If you're already so leery of this that you don't want to click on the link, we'll save you the trip and tell you that the picture that accompanies this ad is a shot of the Las Vegas strip that was obviously lifted from some travel agent's Web site.

Because we love you, we tried to call the number listed. However, it wouldn't let us connect from our cell. Not available from lines of this type, it said. We dug around a little and found what we think is the agency's Web site, which seems very keen on selling you on attending their Talent Boot Camp and lists absolutely no rappers or producers whom they have managed to get on TV.


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HIT Billboard Top 100 Producer looking for Artist (Los Angeles)

Are you looking to work towards finding that 'HIT' song so you can rise above the rest and get the attention from fans/labels/management?

Our team of professionals can help you achieve your vision.

The team includes Los Angeles based Billboard Top 100 Producer/Writer as well as marketing/promotion team with major label contacts and independent avenues to promote your product.

Email for additional information

This producer is obviously so awesome that we know who he is without the ad even mentioning his name. We also get a kick out of the fact that the word hit is both in all caps and in quotation marks. It's like they're admitting that they're screaming a lie at us.

But what the hell, we dropped them an email asking who this mysterious musical genius was and what we had to do to enlist his or her amazing talents. Still haven't heard back. Hit producers are a busy lot, you know?

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3 comments
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Jerry Skolasinski
Jerry Skolasinski

Hey... I have a song recorded about every 20 years. I'm due.

Hemmorhoidcules
Hemmorhoidcules

 That's so bizarre! What a coincidence, I replied to all these exact posts as well. I don't think you should bash them,  my music isn't on Jersey Shore yet, but I did get a really cool Def Leopard key chain in the mail. Keychain = Legit.

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