Kim Kardashian's "Jam" A Hurdle Too Big To Clear

Photos via kimkardashian.celebuzz.com

​Stick to what you're good at: A simple, yet, invaluable lesson that can save you lots of embarrassment. Kim Kardashian hasn't learned that lesson, but she will soon when she breaks into the music industry with her pop debut, "Jam (Turn It Up)," a nightmare of a song created and recorded by R&B sensation The-Dream.

Rocks Off learned the lesson of "stick to what you're good at" much earlier in life during our 8th grade year, when we decided to briefly leave distance running to take on the 300-meter hurdles, because it looked cool.

If only Michael Jordan had decided to take a crack at pro baseball a year earlier, we might have learned from other people's mistakes and saved ourselves the embarrassment of that fateful race at Elsik High School in 1992.

​Going into the home stretch of the 300-meter hurdles, our bony 5'5 frame was barely clearing the last of the race's hurdles, and having never finished worse than third at a track meet in front of our beloved father - may he rest in peace - we were looking at a potentially disastrous 6th-place finish in just our heat: Unacceptable for any walking Rodriguez in sports.

But something incredible happened: The first-place runner failed to clear the very last hurdle, falling and causing a human domino effect that sent the next four runners in front of us falling to the cold hard track before they could cross the finish line, allowing this skinny Mexican kid from Richmond (i.e. Rocks Off) to emerge victorious in the last 10 meters of the race, our arms and fingers firmly pointing to the stars, breaking the tape in glorious fashion.

Something that incredible could only happen at a junior high school track meet, by the way. We have other stories like when the hair weave of a sprinter fell out of our teammate's head and she stopped to quickly reclaim her hair and still won the race.

Anyway, immediately after our unfathomable win, we searched the stands for our father, like Mike Eruzione did when the U.S. men's hockey team upset the Russians in the 1980 Lake Placid Winter Olympics.

But instead of a look of glee and jubilation on our father's face - he often thought it was cool to wear his high-school letterman jacket to our sporting events - he gave us a confused sigh like, "How in the hell did you pull that off, you lucky son of a bitch?"

We nodded to him with a look of understanding that said, "Got it. We'll go back to being a miler."