Waiting For Nicki Minaj: Rap Existentialism At Hush

Photos by Marco Torres

Not Nicki Minaj.

​8:15 p.m.: The premise is simple: Nicki Minaj, perhaps the most buzzy, interesting, interestingly buzzy female rapper of the last decade, will be at Hush tonight as part of her album release celebration. It will be a proper good time, we imagine. The event is listed as happening from 9 p.m. to 2 a.m. This, as you well know, is hogwash. There is absolutely no chance of her showing up at 9 p.m. or 10 p.m. or even 11 p.m.

Still, tickets are going for about $35 bucks or so. If she gets there at midnight, that means you'll have paid $17.50 an hour to stand in the same building with her. We will wait until exactly then for her to get there. If she gets there, awesome. If not, that sucks. But the line has been drawn. The (one-way) standoff has been set into motion. It's before midnight or bust, bitches.

10:47: Wow. Hush is already jumping. The line, ten deep width-wise, stretches around the building. Lots going on right now. These types of shows (those that take place in nightclubs), are almost always poorly managed. Nobody ever knows who's in charge. Point of fact: We tried for four days to get confirmed to attend with several different "promoters" and whatnot, only to never be called back. We'll lay the odds at us actually getting in at about 40 percent.

Also not Nicki Minaj.

​10:53: Hey, leather pants. Excellent.

10:55: There's a small, high stage outside the front of Hush. A woman dressed in little more than underwear is up there shaking the interesting parts of her body. For some reason, there is also a fully clothed man up there too. Is this typical Hush protocol?

10:58: We've just been told by the staff at Hush that we're allowed to take pictures tonight, but only until Nicki shows up. At that point, all cameras must be holstered because, "if she sees one, she's turning around and walking out." It'd be really great if someone could dig up an interview with her saying something like, "You know, I'm just a regular girl" that we could link to.

11:01: And we're in. 59 minutes until we're out. The clock is ticking.

11:07: Go MC Kane is here. He's apparently one of the host MCs. Cool. Know this: If Kane's name is attached to a party or a show, go there. We've yet to see a flat event that he had a part in.