Top 5 Rejected Musician-Licensed Perfumes

Categories: Lists

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The Sex Pistols have their own perfume now.

Go ahead and let that marinate for a second. Your brain is probably trying to reject it as fact, so maybe you'd better have a look at the press release.

Lemon? Black pepper? Patchouli and leather? Sooo... it smells like someone left a lemon-pepper rotisserie chicken inside a 1973 Dodge Dart, right? Or something? Shouldn't it smell like blood, booze and vomit? Or rotten English teeth? Actually, shouldn't it simply not exist at all?

You may think that if they'd make a Sex Pistols perfume, they'd make a scent for anyone. Not true. Here are some that made it all the way to the prototype stage, but were rejected in the end.

1. Ted Nugent's "Canned Hunt"

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Photo illustrations by John Seaborn Gray
What the Press Release Says: "This exotic, earthy scent was designed in part by The Nuge himself and serves the dual purpose of making you smell great while rendering your scent undetectable to most animals. Featuring secret blend of herbs and spices not unlike the kind the Motor City Madman uses to spice his own meats, it'll be sure to attract like-minded ladies while putting a stranglehold on any nearby liberals."

What It Really Smells Like: Wild boar jerky, deer urine and gunpowder.


2. Motorhead's "Ace of Scents"

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What the Press Release Says: "Did Thor himself just crap a lightning bolt up your nose? No, you've simply experienced Motorhead's electrifying new scent for the first time. A whirlwind blend of oils and spices, "Ace of Scents" evokes the epic and the primeval as well as the streetwise and gritty. Once they smell you, they'll know you're dancing with the devil. You won't live forever, but they'll always remember the way you smelled. Can also be used as motor oil (40w)."

What It Really Smells Like: Gasoline and crystal meth.


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