Music's 15 Gnarliest Moustaches

Categories: Art Rock, Lists

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Moustaches are all the rage these days. From shirts to snow globes, rides, wax and tattoos, everyone wants a moustache or at least to support the cause. Rocks Off even has a moustache. When it was longer we combed it while driving or lounging, much to the chagrin of the people around us.

Certain sacrifices must be made to have a moustache. There's the upkeep, keeping it trim and clean, free of food and liquids. Not all women like kissing a moustache either, and it tickles their noses, or they get stray hairs in their mouths. You have to pick what style you want to rock, be it the handlebar, the pencil 'stache, or the Brimley. Also inherently you run the risk of looking like a pedophile or Adolf Hitler if you wear it wrong.

Musicians have had some of the best moustaches ever, behind Major League pitchers and relievers and John Waters. For rockers they become their own trademarks along the way. You can't imagine the most iconic artists without theirs and sometimes your subconscious will convince you that their music sounds better because they have a moustache. Maybe that's just us.

Freddie Mercury

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You just know that Freddie had a moustache stylist on tour who kept his trimmer in a little gilded box near him at all times. He only wanted the best.


Frank Zappa

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During the course of writing this blog, we read that Zappa's estate actually copyrighted his moustache. So if you have a Zappa 'stache, you owe Dweezil, Ahmet, Moon Unit and Diva Muffin a few bucks.


Jeff "Skunk" Baxter

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We want a Skunk Baxter 'stache one day. We know we can have one because it's in our genetic code. Just give us time.


John Oates

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Oates' moustache kinda sucked, but it was fun to look at when coupled with his Afro. How did he get laid in the group's heyday? He must have been hung like Milton Berle.


David Crosby

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Ever see picture of Crosby when he was in prison without a 'stache? It's gross. It's like seeing your father naked.



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