Houston Music Blog

​Rocks Off doesn't mind a good charitable cause, but idiotic over-hype - even for a good cause - is a no-no. We received an email today from one Jimmy Cunningham, whose company has the intriguing name Product Euphoria. According to Cunningham's press release, "Product Euphoria is putting another great production together and would like to invite you out to enjoy the festivities."

Now Rocks Off and other writers at the Press receive these by the jillions. By our own completely unscientific estimation, about 90% of these involve little more than a cursory glance over the item and a quick delete button. But there's something so over-the-top and pretentiously New-Age-speak about Product Euphoria's release we thought it would be a shame not to share it with a blissfully unaware public.

We later discovered that the release is exactly the same as the one in the "About Me" section on the Product Euphoria MySpace site:

"Product Euphoria is a company that is dedicated to helping local, innovative minds show the world what they have to offer, all while helping out those who are in need. The company uses the kindness of artists from all walks of life to put together mixed-media productions with the basis of raising money for charities that will help shape our city and its inhabitants to becoming the individuals that we are all capable of becoming, successful beings.

"Not only is the goal of our company to help raise money for people less fortunate, but we strive to help those struggling to get their foot in the door a chance to get their name out and make a place in their field. With the help and attendance of our city, we too can become a success and bring everyone around us closer to the dreams that drive us to wake up every day."

​Who writes this meandering, self-important tripe, The Kanude? This is guru gobbledy-gook of the highest order. Somehow we were not surprised when we noticed that the only book Jimmy mentions on Product Euphoria's page is The Ancient Secrets of the Flower of Life.

Only a true acid-blitzed New Age spewing mystic could untangle prose like "with the basis of raising money for charities that will help shape our city and its inhabitants to becoming the individuals that we are all capable of becoming, successful beings." This reads like one of those bad Google translations of some phrase in Polish. Or something that would come out of Dr. Phil's mouth.

And we're not sure even the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi or Oprah could decipher this one, although it certainly screams "self-interest" to Rocks Off: "...we too can become a success and bring everyone around us closer to the dreams that drive us to wake up every day."

Buy an alarm clock - that's what most of us use to drive us to wake up every day. After you get the clock, get a job.

Anyway, with such tangle-twisted art-speak spurring us on, we took a chance and clicked on the first "friend" on Product Euphoria's site, "Jimmys Fuckin World." Guess who? (And nice outfits, by the way.)

And, oh, by the way, in case you're interested, here's all that really mattered in Product Euphoria's press release:

"The Dawn of Immortals"

October 16th, 2009

7pm at ROCBAR

$10 7-9pm and $15 9pm+

Costume Design by Erica Lee

Clothing Design by Royal Rush

Performances by Tyler and The American Fangs

"The Dawn of Medusa"

October 23rd, 2009

7pm at ROCBAR

$10 7-9pm and $15 9pm+

Costume Design by Leather Forever

Performances by Another Day and Earshot

Partnering with the Buzzfest Pre-party

Proceeds for the upcoming shows will be donated to M.E.C.A. (Multicultural Education and Counseling through the Arts).