A Houston Man Disappears in Gambia, and Officials Don't Seem to Care

Categories: Whatever

Courtesy Juka Ceesay
Houstonian Alhagie Ceesay and his friend Ebou Jobe disappeared in Gambia in June 2013.
For much of the past year and a half, Juka Ceesay has wondered if her brother was alive or dead.

Alhagie Mamut Ceesay, a 39-year-old father of two, and his friend went to their native Gambia in May 2013 to look into investing in a cashew exporting business. A month later, both men had disappeared, and his family fears they were captured by government officials at the behest of the west African country's dictator, Yahya Jammeh, who has a rather lax approach to basic human rights.

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HPD Says Animals Behind Timbergrove Cat Deaths, Finally Returns Remains to Grieving Owners

Categories: Whatever

Courtesy Chris and Kimberly Elliot
RIP, Moe.
In the last five years, roughly 25 cats in the Timbergrove/Lazybrook neighborhoods have been ripped to pieces and their remains left on people's lawns. Many of these cats were people's pets.

Some in the neighborhood believed a person (or persons) were responsible, and although the Houston Police Department was largely uninterested in residents' complaints, at least one investigator believed the human attacker angle enough to question the parents of a creepy dude being held in Harris County Jail for an unrelated crime. That was in 2013.

Now, after withholding documents and not releasing the remains of one couple's beloved cat, HPD is attributing all of the cat killings to animal attacks.

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City Gets $300,000 for Illegally Removed Oak Trees on Kirby


Remember those massive oak trees that were illegally removed in front of the Wendy's off Kirby a few weeks ago? You know, the ones that triggered a massive uproar after they were chopped down in the middle of the night illegally.

Well, the City of Houston is about to get those dolla, dolla bills, y'all. The issue has already been settled, and to the tune a $300,000 settlement, no less.

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Pat Robertson Says God Has This Creepy, Violent Message for Houston

Categories: Religion, Whatever

Following the City of Houston's ill-advised move to subpoena a bunch of local pastors, we were treated to a smorgasbord of outrage. On one end of the spectrum, the Chron's more mild-mannered editorial board called the subpoenas "Orwellian." Glenn Beck, meanwhile, rage-wept that the situation was "more dangerous to the Republic of Texas than Ebola."

Televangelist Pat Robertson -- who thinks an earthquake ravaged Haiti because of a pact with the devil (for real) -- first called local proponents of LGBT rights "terrorists." But even last week's announcement from Mayor Annise Parker and City Attorney David Feldman that they would drop the controversial subpoenas wasn't enough to calm Robertson, who followed up with his own unhinged "message" for Houston that, naturally, involves a deadly tale of biblical gang rape.

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Here's What You Can Do With That Extra Hour This Weekend

Categories: Whatever

Hey, guys. Guess what? This weekend is the end of daylight saving time.

Yep, it's time to change your clock, and it's not even the sucky time change where everything takes place earlier, either.

On November 2, the clocks around the country will "Fall Back" at 2 a.m., none of that sleep-stealing "Spring Forward" crap, which means you get an extra hour to do whatever it is you silly kids do past 2 a.m.

We're here to help you find your way into trouble, even if we'll be passed out on the couch with Investigation Discovery blaring in the background. That's why we've made it a point to dig around and find out just what you can do with your extra hour, other than nap.

Here are your options. At 2 a.m., you'll gain an extra hour of:

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Lotto Shuts Down 'Fun 5' Game Because People Got Upset When They Found Out They Lost

Fun 5 tickets are still floating around Houston...and we found some.
A batch of Texas Lotto scratch-offs have become a major source of contention for frustrated lotto players, who say the language on Fun 5 is misleading. And for that confusion, they say they're owed millions.

The controversy revolving around Fun 5 is limited to one specific game on the card -- Game 5 -- which gives players the following instructions for identifying a winning ticket:

Reveal three "5" symbols in any one row, column or diagonal, win PRIZE in PRIZE box. Reveal a Money Bag symbol in the 5X BOX, win 5 times that PRIZE.

Most people would think these two-sentence instructions are pretty darn simple and should be interpreted as scratch Game 5, reveal three fives in a row and win a prize. Scratch Game 5, reveal three fives in a row and a money bag, and well, you're rolling in five times the cash.

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Hearst Drops an Ebola Joke

Categories: Whatever

Check out this gut-buster from the San Antonio Express-News

For the past couple weeks, even we've been like, you know what, maybe let's not joke about Ebola just yet...

Apparently Hearst feels differently.

HSPCA and Prosecutors Won't Say How Rescued Dog Died

Categories: Whatever

Courtesy Susan Culver
Is Bella alive or dead? The HSPCA won't say, and we can't imagine why.
The Houston SPCA and Galveston County District Attorney's Office are not revealing the fate of a dog whose former foster believes overheated and died during a highly publicized seizure in Santa Fe last month.

Susan Culver says the dog's death was disclosed at a September court hearing to decide what to do with more than 100 dogs, turtles, and snakes recovered from a home belonging to Joe Granata. However, Culver says HSPCA personnel would not say how the plott hound mix named Bella died -- only that she was not euthanized. The Galveston County Sheriff's Office's seizure inventory listed Bella as being in good condition.

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Why Moving Pride out of Montrose Is a Big Deal

Photo by Julian Bajsel
Social media went haywire last week when Pride Houston announced that next year's Houston LGBT Pride Celebration will take place downtown, leaving its Montrose home of more than three decades.

Many were shocked because they weren't told this was happening ahead of time. And while there have been grumblings for years that Pride might have outgrown the Montrose, very few people appear to have known that this would be the year Pride Houston finally pulls the trigger and relocates.

On Facebook, people posted photos of old "PomPom" shirts ("People Opposed to Moving Pride out of Montrose"). JD Doyle, a grand marshal in last year's parade, wrote: "As the Pride Committee did not solicit community input regarding the decision, it is extremely difficult for us to make a reason judgment on it. Knowing how controversial this would be, they took that from us."

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Lessons Learned From Open Carry, the Children's Book

Categories: Whatever

The cover!

There are a lot of things to love about the whole open carry movement. For one thing, the fervent belief that firearms should be carried by all people at all times has translated to some, shall we say, interesting moments in daily life.

Open carry proponents have showed up at restaurants and stores and on street corners to tote their weapons in public, all while wearing smiles and acting as friendly as Ned Flanders. Yes, the movement has also led to some awkward incidents like the time Open Carry Texas members planned to march through the Fifth Ward, which would have translated, at least optics-wise, to a bunch of white guys with guns marching through a historically black neighborhood. Then there were the times that Target and Chili's and Starbucks and Chipotle asked those who openly carry their weapons to please refrain from doing so in their stores.

But the thing that is most striking about the open carry folks is how much they don't care what people think, how convinced they are that their way is the right way and that those not comfortable with their guns are just "uninformed." Nowhere is this narrow-as-a-gun-barrel on view of the world as prominently on display as in the children's book, My Parents Open Carry: An Open Carry Adventure.

The book, written by a couple of guys from Open Carry Michigan, is probably going to go down in the annals of literary history alongside Ted Cruz, the coloring book, and all the other children's books ever concocted as another way of advancing political arguments at a truly grass roots level. It's great because the authors of My Parents Open Carry don't give a dang what anyone thinks, which sure makes for some entertaining reading. They even put blurbs of praise from both Glenn Beck AND Stephen Colbert on the back of their book.

So let's go over some of the life lessons contained in the pages of My Parents Open Carry.

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