College Football, Week 8: 4 Winners, 4 Losers

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A few weeks ago, we had maybe the most thrilling college football weekend of the last ten years (possibly since the 2005 weekend that included, among other fantastic finishes, the "Bush Push" game between USC and Notre Dame). It was twelve hours of dramatic endings and pinball scoring stats, everything that's great about this time of the year and the age we live in (multiple games on television, computer streaming, social media).

The great thing about college football, though, is that you don't need great finishes for the sport to be compelling. This past Saturday we had plenty of buildup to marquee match ups and potential career altering twists for some head coaches. However, in the end, there were a lot more blowouts and popcorn farts on Saturday than there were Instant Classics.

And yet, even from the ashes of numerous boring thrashings, we get storylines. Sure, we love the hits, the physicality, the game day pomp and circumstance of a football Saturday (or Sunday), but no other sport has the episodic advantage and storyline arc that college and pro football have.

The games are great, but now they're over, and now we essentially have six days to pore over what it all means. THAT'S AWESOME. So let's commence poring with the winners and losers from this weekend's college football action...

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College and Pro Football: This Weekend's Best Bets

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Joel Kramer
If you followed my picks last season (and God forbid, used them as your own picks), then you know exactly how painful the hit was by the end of the year. In fact, you're probably cursing me and contemplating exactly how you can dismember me without getting arrested while you stand in the welfare line.

On the other hand, if you merely decided to fade my picks last year and just go opposite, you're probably toasting me from the additional wing you've added to your home.

Well, I don't ever want to got through 2013 again, yet sadly last week was a 1-5 effort that became commonplace as last season (much like the Texans 2013) slipped away into "Bolivian" (as the great Mike Tyson would say). I can't go through that again. I won't go through that again.

So for this week's wagering pep talk, I'm bringing in the big guns. When you need words of inspiration, words to remind you that you can make it through anything if you put your mind to it...you call on your home boy...you call on your friends...you call on your (Houston) blood....you call on....

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Fan Fighting League! European Soccer Division (Including Drones And Fireworks)

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YouTube
Since I invented it a couple of years ago, the Fan Fighting League has been almost exclusively a football thing (with the rare baseball exception).

However, if we take the world as a whole and step outside of our American cocoon for a minute, it's logical to ask ourselves, "Why haven't we broken down an international soccer fight yet?" Honestly, it's a great question. Why haven't we??"

On Wednesday night, I found myself wondering that exact thing. So I went to Twitter to see just how easy (or difficult) it would be to find an international soccer match with a fan fight in it. I searched Twitter using "soccer fan brawl," and lo and behold, it was even easier to find one than I thought it would be!

For our first soccer entry into the FFL, we head to Serbia, where the Serbian and Albanian national soccer teams were facing off in a qualifier for the 2016 European Championship. If you've ever asked yourself, "What would it be like if we plunked a soccer game down in the middle of the Oakland Coliseum and made all the Raiders fans Serbians?" then you're about to get your answer.

And really, who hasn't wondered that?

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Fan Fighting League! Red River Shootout Edition

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YouTube
In the pantheon of college football rivalries, few have the combination of tradition and bitter hatred of the Red River Shootout between Oklahoma and Texas.

(NOTE: I refuse to call it by the more politically correct Red River Rivalry, as if somehow including the word Shootout means that the irresponsible usage of guns is somehow being endorsed and encouraged by those associated with this game.)

With the State Fair as the backdrop, the Sooners and the Longhorns square off every season (usually with a way-too-early-for-most kickoff time before noon) and, more often than not, this game has some sort of impact on the national title race. For many seasons, the big-picture implications applied to both teams, but this season only Oklahoma is relevant on the national front.

Texas is clearly in rebuilding mode, and when one team has such a clear advantage over the other, it can lead to emotions boiling over. And no, I'm not talking about the players on the field. I'm talking about the frat bro douche-sters in the parking lot.

For the next Fan Fighting League installment, let's head to Dallas this past weekend where feelings were hurt and blows were exchanged...

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The Sports Hate Between the Rockets and Mavericks May Be Approaching Football Levels

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Graphic by Monica Fuentes
As the horn sounded ending the first game of the NBA preseason between the Houston Rockets and the Dallas Mavericks, former Rocket fan favorite (ample stress on the word "former") Chandler Parsons, now a centerpiece for the Mavs, made his way over to the Rockets' bench area to exchange salutations with his ex-teammates and ex-coaches.

A bear hug from Dwight Howard, a handshake and squeeze from James Harden, a brief cordial chat with Rockets head coach Kevin McHale, the post game scene between Parsons and his former cohorts appeared warm and friendly. It belied the acrimony from Parsons that had bubbled up shortly after his departure to Dallas and boiled over from both sides in the weeks leading up to the 2014-15 season.

"It's crazy the first time I play with my new team it's against my old team, but it was fun to get out there and play against someone else other than ourselves," Parsons said afterward. "Once the ball goes up in the air, all of the awkwardness and the weirdness kind of went away from me playing Houston."

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If You Want More Teams in the College Football Playoff, Here's What to Root For

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colorblindPICASO
Some old habits are hard to break, and as flawed as the old Bowl Championship Series (affectionately referred to and twisted into juvenile alternate acronyms as the "BCS") was, it still began to consume me right about this time every college football season.

The BCS got a lot of stuff wrong, but one thing that they did get right was that they didn't release their rankings until the week around October 15, as opposed to the other polls that came out before anyone had played a game yet. (Of course, a huge element of the BCS rankings was the coaches poll that started in the preseason, so even in the parts the BCS had right, it was still laced with flaws.)

So normally, this week would be the time where we would brace ourselves and see how exactly the Harris Poll voters and the computers would effect the BCS big picture.

Now, though, we live in a brave new college football world, a world with a four team playoff, creatively entitled the "College Football Playoff." (Side bar: I'd love to see the presentation by the marketing company that came up with that name. "After weeks of deliberation, here's what we've come up with....COLLEGE FOOTBALL PLAYOFF..." Cut to Bill Hancock asking his secretary if they kept the receipt for the marketing firm's hourly charges.)

So at the halfway point of the season, it's time to examine just who's eliminated, who's still in, who's got the most work to do, and most importantly, what we should all be rooting for (independent of our own collegiate affiliations) in order make this thing bigger than just four teams (which is one consensus everyone seems to agree on...this playoff needs to be BIGGER. Eight teams, at least).

So let's take a look....

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Colts 33, Texans 28: 4 Winners, 4 Losers

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Photo by Marco Torres
Watt recovered a fumble by Andrew Luck and to it to the house...for his THIRD touchdown of the season.
Well, that was a pretty freaking painful four days, huh?

If you're trying to construct the most painful way to chase an overtime loss to your hated in-state rival, the Texans did a pretty good job of it on Thursday night, falling behind the Indianapolis Colts 24-0 in the first quarter, riding the greatness of J.J Watt to a furious comeback, before two fumbles in the final five minutes allowed the Colts to breathe a sigh of relief and leave town with a 33-28 win.

It's painful to quantify just how disastrous this loss is, especially considering that a) the Texans have never won in Indianapolis (meaning 0-2 against them is heavy chalk) and b) Indy seems to be hitting its stride. If you're a Texans fan who aspires to have postseason football on the schedule in January, then the route (as jagged and unlikely as it may be) now goes through the collection of teams in the AFC North plus the Buffalo Bills in going after the other wild card spot.

Assuming the Patriots win the AFC East and the AFC West has two playoff teams (major chalk bets right now), then Buffalo, Pittsburgh, Cleveland, Cincinnati and Baltimore is the new "division."

So great news, Texans Fan! You're 1-0 in the division! Suck it, Buffalo!!

Okay, now on to winners and losers....

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College and Pro Football: This Weekend's Best Bets (Including Colts-Texans!)

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John Wardell
In betting, there are weekends where you're looking to score big, where even finishing at or slightly above .500 feels like a slight disappointment, like a running back who left yards on the field.

Then there are weekends like last weekend.

Saturday was utter chaos, like the last 45 minutes of a Transformers movie combined with the Rahad Jackson scene from the climax of Boogie Nights (and yes, I just emitted a juvenile snicker typing the words "climax of Boogie Nights," sue me). Underdogs not only covering left and right, but outright winning some of these games to where, by the end of the weekend, five of the top eight teams in the AP went down, and somehow on Sunday morning, TCU and Arizona were in the top ten.

It was like a drug-induced haze, and by the time Connor Holliday was done putting up 734 yards passing in a loss to Cal, we had blacked out long ago, then on Sunday we woke up with a Horned Frog and a Wildcat on our beds.

Truth be told, it would've been less weird waking up with an actual horned frog and wildcat in our beds than seeing what we saw on Saturday in college football. And I feel fortunate. Why?

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The Houston Texans "Behind the Chains": Lose Yards, Kill Drive

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Photo by Aaron M. Sprecher
If you read my entries in this blog, you know there are certain things that I find intriguing -- fan fights in stadium bathrooms, crime stories from the state of Florida, crime stories involving NFL players, the occasional recreational wager. These things all intrigue me.

But if you examine closely, those things all involve some sort of debauchery and, most times, some illegality. I don't want all of you to think that I'm some meathead crime troll. I can be analytical as well!

One thing that also concerns me greatly (aside from toothless rednecks on meth and whether or not Alabama can cover a ten point spread) is the welfare of our hometown football team. I like the Houston Texans, and while they're a respectable 3-2 right now, it's a rickety 3-2, built on the duct tape of positive turnover margin and the toothpaste of a weak early season schedule.

So what's my biggest concern right now?


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Fan Fighting League! Niner Fan on Niner Fan Bathroom Violence (w/ VIDEO)

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For decades, it's been largely agreed that the least safe place as a road team fan to go see a game is Oakland Coliseum. But is that actuality?

Yes, the sea of black and silver sets an intimidating backdrop, and the gaggle of societal misfits in their face paint and spiked shoulder pads is downright scary, and the Raider logo itself has ties to gangs going back to their days in Los Angeles. If this were a branding course, these things would all point to a brand built around violence and instilling fear.

But I can say, having been to both a Niners game and a Raiders game in the same evening last year, I was much more uneasy in Candlestick Park during daylight than I was Oakland at night.

The Niner crowd has a lot of bad dudes, as evidenced by their practically weekly appearances in my Fan Fighting League YouTube recaps. And honestly, you knew this one was just a matter of time....

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