Constructing the Perfect Five-Man College Football Coaching Wrecking Crew

Categories: Game Time, Sports

Sean is up for the challenge.
To say that the internet is the gift that keeps on giving implies that we're cool with all of its little trends, memes, and time wasters.

To be clear, there is plenty of repetitive, over-thought sludge that comes from our friend, the world wide web. Tebowing and flash mobs had their runs as general web nuisances, and don't get me started on whoever brought Gangnam style into the mainstream.

But occasionally, we get morsels of brain food that spark debate and evoke thought. To that end, of late, there seem to be a preponderance of salary cap style opinion purchase challenges (that's the best way I can describe them). In other words, "You have twenty bucks, here's five groups of mobsters categorized by city, each with his own price -- now go put together the most bad ass crew possible. GO!"

I don't know how it happened, I'm just glad it did. I love stuff like this. And with the college football season almost here, this is the latest....

It presumably started with this tweet from Lost Lettermen, comparing the inter-conference sniping between coaches to a WWE Money In The Bank ladder match....

From there, as best I can gather, this fellow named Matthew Kocsan possibly invented and definitely posted this challenge -- assemble the most bad ass five man tag team of college football head coaches using one from each conference based on these prices.

You have $15. GO!

The list is embedded in this tweet....

I am totally up for this challenge! Before I give you my fivesome, let me outline my perfect five man WWE-style faction. To me, the shopping list goes like this:

- One (1) undeniable leader, instills belief, failure is not an option
- One (1) big man, either super duper tall or morbidly obese
- One (1) unhinged lunatic, the type who would need to be subdued by five cops
- One (1) freakishly strong, tree stump type, the more rectangular, the better
- One (1) small, chicken shit heel type (high flying and bump taking skills preferred)

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