Matt Schaub's Oakland Press Conference: This Is Why They're The Raiders

BeardSchaub.jpg
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Now we know how Han Solo felt.
I've always wondered what Han Solo felt like when he was melted out of his carbonite shell at the beginning of Return of the Jedi.

If you recall, he had been in hibernation for an undisclosed (but not insignificant) amount of time when finally, the other meddling kids, Luke and Leia, hatched a plan to free him from the claws of Jabba the Hutt. When he was finally liberated from the body-shaped shackles, Solo had no idea where he was, where he'd been, or how long he'd been frozen in carbonite. (Hell, dude couldn't even see.)

How long was I out for? A day? A month? A decade? That had to be what Han was thinking, right?

Indeed, I always wondered what those first few unfrozen seconds felt like for Solo.

Well, after Friday's press conference welcoming Matt Schaub to the Oakland Raiders, I no longer wonder.

On Friday, the Oakland Raiders, still presumably adhering to the mantras of "Commitment to Excellence" and "Just Win, Baby," traded a sixth round draft pick to the Houston Texans for Schaub.

Let me say that again in more poignant terms -- another NFL team gave up something of worth for the right to pay Matt Schaub $10 million to quarterback their team in 2014. Matty Pick-Six, Matty Ice Cold, Case Keenum's backup. That Matt Schaub.

MATT ..... SCHAUB.

And they didn't just trade a draft choice for him. They gave him a hero's welcome, 2014 style, complete with self congratulatory tweets from the organization, pictures of Schaub proudly sporting the silver and black, and a press conference which will live on YouTube forever (You do realize, Raiders, that shit is forever, right?) where words like "winner" and "championship" were used by and about Matt Schaub.


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10 comments
Steve Tyrrell
Steve Tyrrell

Shoot Pete. A Texan QB might be worth a sixth rounder to the Raiders. Even if he rides the pine. What could possibly go wrong?

Christopher Legington
Christopher Legington

Let's talk about the Texans. Matt Schaub is no longer a Texan, so let's move on!

Michael Terry
Michael Terry

I still have faith in Schaub and believe the Texans have made a mistake.

David Alan Turchen
David Alan Turchen

And your mean and thoughtless commentaries are why no one takes you seriously.

Brazos
Brazos

Sean, I just want to say how much you've improved the afternoon show. Rich is great but god, that idiot was hard to listen to.  Thank you, thank you thank you. Or should I be addressing this at management.  :)

Puller58
Puller58

The Raiders are still as dysfunctional as when Al Davis was alive.  Schaub compared to Rich Gannon?  Maybe in age, but not in talent.

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