Wasted Jacoby Jones Is Enjoying His Offseason
1. Quite a crowd on hand for this heavyweight tilt between the Kings and the Pellies. Basketball dorks (of which I count myself as one) like to get hot and bothered by some of the young players in the league, and Boogie Cousins of the Kings and Anthony Davis of the Pelicans are two of those guys. And both are phenomenal young players. However, this crowd is a fair indicator of where both of them stand on the "put butts in seats" scale. There are only a handful of players the average NBA fan will pay money specifically to see -- LeBron, Durant, Kobe before his body turned 56 years old, maybe the CP3/Blake combo, that might be it.
(FOLLOW UP NOTE: Since I blogged this stream-of-conscious style, I didn't see that the score was 109-89 during this interview, so yes, some of the fans probably had gone home. Still, I stand by my "butts in seats" list above.)
2. The early, random stressing of the word "the" (pronounced "DUH") before "Super Bowl" in Jacoby's first sentence tells us...this is going to be AWESOME.
3. The reporter tries to confirm that it's really been since last year's Super Bowl since Jacoby was last in his hometown of New Orleans (which, given his commitments last off season is entirely possible), and he just breaks out with "It's been AWKWIDDD..." Well, it hasn't been AWKWIDDD yet, Jacoby, but my guess is that in the next 90 seconds it could be.
4. When asked about his offseason plans, and this is where I love Jacoby's honesty, he doesn't give lip service to "working out, staying focused, getting' my mind right..." Jacoby just flat out admits -- "I'M GETTIN' FAT..." Then he starts listing New Orleans cuisine. And then I got hungry. And then I started...continued, actually...to get FAT.
5. The personal highlight for me -- Jacoby's meandering into actual game analysis on the Super Bowl, his factoring in the weather, then saying the team that plays out side will win, and then realizing both teams are outdoor teams. Please, please, please, ESPN, fire SOMEBODY on the Countdown set and add Jacoby Jones.
CONCLUSION: I would easily pay $1000 for Wasted Jacoby Jones to be the entertainment at a young child's birthday party or a wedding or a corporate event. Wasted Jacoby Jones brings people together. Everybody loves Wasted Jacoby Jones.
Except Sweet Pea.