Broncos Win...According to Moody Gardens Football-Prognosticating Komodo Dragons

Categories: Football, Sports

komodo-super-bowl.jpg
Courtesy Moody Gardens
Murphy here might not be Puppy Bowl cute, but he predicts the future! And he might eat your face off.
From Jimmy the Greek to whatever current incarnation of oddsmakers in Las Vegas will offer you this week's picks "free on a recorded message," there have always been people willing to give you their opinions on who will win a game, among any number of other crazy bets that gambling degenerates are willing to spend their hard-earned cash on. My colleague Sean Pendergast has a much better grasp on this whole betting thing, but does he or any of the Vegas bookies have a Komodo dragon?

Well, Moody Gardens does -- two, in fact. And in addition to this species being the largest lizards in existence -- though much smaller than what I normally imagine dragons to look like except for, of course, the band Imagine Dragons, who don't look like lizards at all -- they like them some football (or at least the leather because it is made of flesh and all). In fact, they made their picks for the Super Bowl and, if you are a Broncos fan and believe in the magic power of dragons, you might be pleasantly surprised with the outcome.

The staff at Moody Gardens in Galveston put footballs with paint on them representing the team colors of the Broncos and Seahawks inside the cage of the animals. Both Murphy and Diablo made their way to the Broncos ball first, obviously crowning that team the favorite.

Komodo dragons are some of the most deadly hunters in the world. If you recall, it was a Komodo dragon that attacked Sharon Stone's husband back in 2001 after he unwisely got into its cage on a private tour at the LA zoo. He survived with all but his dignity intact.

My point is that, even though these aren't exactly the dragons of Khaleesi in Game of Thrones, they will mess you up, so if you know what's good for you, you'll bet on Denver. I hope you are listening, Vegas. I bet (get it?) this pushes the line -- currently making the Broncos one-point favorites -- to at least three.

The Komodo dragons will be unveiled in a new exhibit at Moody Gardens in Galveston on February 15.


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2 comments
Seymour Slutz
Seymour Slutz

kill it before it gets any bigger... Those mother fuckers got there own island.... Its called deeea delllla josenta.. it means your lunch in the language of the people they stole the island from.. its a real fucked up story... These mother fuckers wiped out a whole race. stole there island. and till this day they are sitting on deeea delllla josenta... on a island... thinking... how can i get me some more of that human meat... kill it!

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