One Fool's 2014 Houston Sports Predictions

Categories: Sports

csn houston.jpg
Yes, CSN Houston will become available to all in 2014
With 2013 giving way to 2014, it's time for a few predictions that will, more than likely, be way off the mark. But what the hell, that means I'll be just like the rest of my sportswriting brethren. So...


The next status conference in bankruptcy court before Judge Marvin Isgur is scheduled for January 7, 2014. Here's guessing that Les Alexander will announce that he has reached a tentative deal with Jim Crane to purchase the portion of the network owned by the Astros, and another stay will be granted in the bankruptcy proceedings while the details are worked out. Alexander will purchase this portion for less than what Crane initially sought, but Alexander will pay Crane the money that he claims the network owes him for 2013. The parties will also reach a deal in which Crane sells the Astros broadcast rights to CSN Houston for an amount close to what Fox Sports Southwest is paying the Rangers.

By the time February roles around, Alexander will reach a deal with Direct TV, AT&T U-verse, Time Warner and SuddenLink to broadcast CSN Houston in the Houston region and the surrounding counties and presto, the Rockets games will be aired to everyone. By mid-March, Alexander will announce that he and Fox Sports have agreed to become partners in CSN Houston -- much like with CSN Bay Area. This will inject more money into the network, and Fox Sports will make CSN Houston available to the Fox Sports Southwest network as secondary programming, which will allow Astros games to reach the same broadcast footprint as when originally on FSN Southwest.


The Texans will hire Ken Whisenhunt to be the team's next head coach because he's a supposed offensive genius. Whisenhunt, who's only actually been an offensive genius when he's had a good QB to work with, i.e., Ben Roethlisberger, Kurt Warner or Philip Rivers, will decide that the team should draft Derek Carr with the first pick of the NFL draft. And to help Carr make the adjustment to the NFL, he will direct Rick Smith to sign Green Bay backup Matt Flynn.

As happened with Flynn at Seattle and Oakland, he will lose the starting job to Carr in camp. Carr will be lost to injury in the second game. Flynn will start the season's third game, and be awful, prompting the Texans to go through the Rolodex for available QBs and will run through Josh Freeman, Tyler Thigpen, John Skelton, Kellen Clemens, Josh Johnson, Chad Henne, Kevin Kolb, Vince Young, Tim Tebow and Sam Bradford.

Brian Cushing will be lost to a season-ending injury in the season's first game, and the defense will once again fall apart as Smith and Whisenhunt ignored the defense in the draft and free agency while attempting to fix the offensive line. The team will once again finish last in the AFC South. Bob McNair will state that he sees improvement, meaning that Rick Smith will once again keep his job.

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I actually thought the Wiz might get picked since he has had some success in the NFL.  (Although I think Lovie Smith might still get the nod.)  Derrick Carr?  Someone please bring in a real GM and have McNair go off and count his money.  (More and more little "stories" are beginning to make McNair sound a lot like Drayton McLane.)  The Astros will likely suck, and the Dome might still be around, but as for Comcast, who knows?

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