Summer of Johnny: Revenge of the Chancellor

johnny-manziel.jpg
I'm not gonna lie. I miss Johnny Football.

No, not Johnny Manziel the risk-taking, freewheeling beast of a quarterback who tortured SEC defenses last season to the tune of over 5,000 yards of total offense. We've heard rumblings of his existence at Texas A&M's practices, and I know someday (like next Saturday) we will see him again.

I'm talking about Johnny Football. Johnny Fucking Football. The overly feisty, drunk-tweeting, wheelin'-dealin', kiss-stealin' son of a gun!

I miss that guy.

It's been 21 days since Johnny Manziel last spoke on Twitter, when he fired off this beauty that appears to be some combination of bad rap lyrics, an open challenge to fight and a cry for help:

Since then, he's given us nothing, due wholly I'm sure to the ongoing cloud hanging over Manziel and the university until the situation with Johnny's rogue autograph sessions has been resolved. That's right -- in addition to chiseling this small pothole of adversity into the Aggies' 2013 season, the memorabilia hounds have directly caused the deprivation of bikini pics and Twitter fights on Johnny's social-media accounts.

In short, we hate you, autograph hounds.

And you know who else hates you? Texas A&M Chancellor John Sharp, that's who! Specifically, he's looking right at you, Drew Tieman. In his e-mail to members of the A&M community, he says that he thinks you're a dope-smoking, probation-addled scumbag who clams up at the first sight of real authority, Drew Tieman (I'm paraphrasing.):

In fact, his "named source," Drew Tieman (initially referred to as the broker), was reportedly booked twice for possession of marijuana and placed on four years probation. He has taken down his Facebook page, changed his telephone number and is refusing attempts to be interviewed by the NCAA.

Basically, John Sharp thinks you're a little bitch, Drew Tieman! (Again, paraphrasing.)



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5 comments
Brian Burch
Brian Burch

Condoning breaking the rules?? That's and odd departure for a Chancellor... Hope it works out for him when Manziel is suspended..good article..

Anse
Anse

I don't see anything in the Johnny Football saga that you wouldn't see in the average bro-tastic college guy's lifestyle. He had a fake ID once; big deal, so did I. He likes to party; who doesn't like to party at that age? He's been a little obnoxious. Well, he's a rich kid and he's getting a ton of attention, so the fact that he's only been obnoxious and not a massive over-indulged trainwreck of egotistical self-entitlement and general bad behavior is probably a miracle. I don't go out of my way to sympathize with famous rich kids, but we could cut the guy some slack. If he has another year like he had last year, none of this is going to matter to anybody. Every one of his haters in the NCAA and fans of UT and the rest of the SEC would give anything to have him on their roster.

And if he has a crappy year, well, let 'em hate.

brian_in_blax
brian_in_blax

Much like Canseco, he might be a scumbag but that doesn't make him wrong.  Tieman is going to bring down both Johnnys.  And that's too bad, but it's not undeserved.

wcvemail
wcvemail

Along with everything else, Johnny Football showed that we got some bikini-posin' skillz in Texas, too. Take that, USC's Leinart and the glamor boys from glamor schools. (I think it was Leinert who was pictured with both bikini babes and a bong, too.)

Sean, here's an idea - rank the bikinis posed with QBs, tie that to something real like the eventual NFL coach's strictness quotient, or something. C'mon, you're the sports guy, give us some stats based on party pictures. It's tough wading through all those bikinis, but you knew the job was dangerous when you signed up for it.

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