Ice Cube Bids Farewell to Dwight Howard in an F-Bomb Laced Tirade (w/ VIDEO)
Now that Dwight Howard has made his decision on where he intends to play basketball for the next few years of his life, I suppose this is how it will go for the foreseeable future.
Shaquille O'Neal said that Howard ran from the bright lights so he could hide in our "little town."
Phil Jackson said that Pau Gasol is a better fit than Dwight for Mike D'Antoni's offense anyway.
Kobe Bryant simply put a picture of himself and Pau Gasol on Instagram, while unfollowing Howard on Twitter. (SOCIAL MEDIA BURN!)
When you say, "Thanks, but no thanks" to a franchise as storied as the Lakers, in a city with as much star power as Los Angeles, for those you leave behind, it's not so much "good-bye" as it is "fuck you."
And when it comes to Ice Cube bidding farewell to Dwight, I mean that it's "fuck you" quite literally.
The gangster rapper turned lighthearted comedic actor is one of the more renowned celebrity Laker fans in the City of Angels, and like practically every other Lakers fan, Ice Cube is incredulous that Dwight Howard could willingly choose to play on a team with a 24-year-old All-Star shooting guard, a budding nucleus and a Hall of Fame player as a head coach, all in a state with no state income tax.
Cube can't believe that Dwight would choose that scenario over playing with a team whose average age in the starting lineup is 34, whose best player is coming off of Achilles surgery, whose coach runs a system that's a terrible fit and whose owner is a petty clown, in a state with 13% income tax (THIRTEEN PERCENT!).
In short, Ice Cube is a typical Lakers fan: myopic, delusional, and stuck somewhere between 1988 and 2010.
(Sidebar: There was a time where I would have been terrified to make fun of Ice Cube, back when he would regularly spit out lyrics about AK-47s being jammed into various bodily cavities. But now, well, now he argues over whether or not he is cooler than a beer can....
....so I'm far less scared of him.)
Well, over the weekend, Cube was performing at the Greek Theater in Los Angeles, and took that opportunity to get off this little Howard-related rant (warning: NSFW, unless you work in sports talk radio):
Mini Zapruder time...