Texas's Representative Can't Help But Support Faulty Science, Fetal Masturbation

Categories: Crime

It's great that you're a doctor. It's unfortunate that you're not scientifically literate.
If you never thought you'd see the day in which an elected United States Representative discusses, in an open forum, a fetus taking pleasure in genital touching, you may want to stop reading this post. If, however, you were always under the impression that it was inevitable that a member of the House -- and a member of the stridently antiabortion GOP, no less -- would have no problem discussing a zygote's views on sexual pleasure, this one's for you.

In a hearing on the forthcoming HR 1797, which would all but outlaw abortions nationwide after 20 weeks, Michael Burgess, representing Texas's 26th district, decided that he would offer his expertise on the matter. We like to think that Burgess, as an OB/GYN, would bring a sound voice to the discussion. We like to think he may provide a bit of scientific salience for a party in which evolution and climate change somehow remain controversial.

Boy, were we wrong. As to the video evidence:

We're not really even sure where to begin. Burgess, whose comments were originally picked up over at RH Reality Check, describes a male fetus shoving his paws in between his legs, to no end. The representative perceives such motions as pleasurable for the young, licentious zygote. Offering little more than anecdote and assumption, Burgess has dictated, all scientific research aside, that 20-week-old fetuses can somehow experience physical pleasure -- ipso facto, they can also feel pain.

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johnnybench topcommenter

Why doesn't he think female fetuses masturbate? 


@johnnybench Because that would indicate that females can feel sexual pleasure, which we all know is a myth concocted by the Liberal Media ©.

Now as to why he is even thinking about fetuses masturbating, well, I think we need to defer to a trained psychologist or someone to figure that creep-fest out.

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