Ten Other Gum-Themed Gang Names to Rival the "Big Red Gangstas"

Categories: Whatever

gum-gansta.jpg
Better check yo self before you wreck yo self.
According to reports, there was a spate of vandalism over the weekend out in the Willowbrook area. Car windows were smashed, things were spray-painted and general breaking of things happened. And apparently it was the work of the Big Red Gangstas. No one yet knows if this is an actual gang or just a bunch of kids with cinnamon-fresh breath, but it got us to thinking about the fact that this sounds like one of the least scary gang names of all time.

And while we're at it, what other chewing gums could be used as the inspiration for gang-related activities and general tomfoolery? Sure, the Icy Hot Stutaz sounds like a taste explosion, but it's really just a bunch of kids who pimp their cheap foreign cars and wear too much Day-Glo.

So, for you would-be minor mafiosos out there, here are some options if you think gum should be your trademark.

Big League Crew

With a gang named after a gateway gum to chewing tobacco, no fools will dare mess with you and your sugar-rotten teeth.


Juicy Fruit Murder Posse

Let's be honest, the name Juicy Fruit doesn't exactly inspire fear in anyone, but add Murder Posse to the end and you have a deliciously terrifying name.


Doublemint Twin Terrors

Now, if you could get this gang to be populated only with identical twins, that shit would be scary. It would be like holographic projections, but for real, yo.


Bazooka Bitches

Either a killer all-girl street gang or roller-derby team. Boom goes the dynamite!


Dentyne Killas

Because Dentyne really is killa. No, seriously, it's tasty.

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1 comments
Khalil McMillan
Khalil McMillan

Really?  No takers?  This is rife with funny!!!  I'll start with The Icy Hot Stuntaz (check ya spellinz Jeff).  I really can't tell if they are untalented Boondocks Suburban Wiggas or if they are masters of "irony".

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