DO NOT Mess with Christa Nicole Parker, Unless You Want 15 Punches and Wine Bottle Upside Your Head

Categories: Crime

Photo by Harlingen PD
Christa Parker is a handful.
It's hard to believe that a common-law marriage doesn't always go smoothly, but it can be true.

And if it is true, you don't want to be common-law married to Christa Nicole Parker. When she gets pissed, she does something about it.

Harlingen police say they got a domestic disturbance call and arrived at a home where a 51-year-old man said he had been in an argument with Parker, 33.

According to the police report:

The victim advised that one point PARKER began punching him with a closed fist. The victim stated that PARKER struck him approximately 15 times about his body and face. The victim then began packing items so that he could leave the residence, when PARKER
followed him into the bathroom area, and struck him over the head with a wine bottle, causing it to break.

"The victim managed to call a friend and asked him to notify the police," the report says, which seems to be a case of unnecessarily involving a middleman.

The victim had swelling and lacerations on his head and forearm, police say.

Parker was charged with felony aggravated assault.

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She's gets an honorary "Crystal". 


Women think they can get away with this type of shit because the men dont want to beat the life out of them. Everyone oooh's and aaah's when its a woman being chraged with domestic violence, despite the fact that women commit this crime constantly...throwing things, pushing, or slapping their husband. Most men are just big enough to not pay attention to the silly little girl. It's nice to see that more men are starting to call the cops and let the law deal with it instead of turning their cheek.

Nightmare on Bagby
Nightmare on Bagby

Still say the best rhyme in  the history of Texas letters is from Robert Earl Keen: "Fred and Rita came from Harlingen/ Can't remember how I'm kin to them."

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