For Flag Day: The 10 Worst U.S. State Flags

Categories: Whatever

(For a list of our ten worst national flags, click here.)

As we are sure you are no doubt keenly aware, Flag Day is tomorrow. We could give you a list of the ten prettiest flags, but we are Hair Balls, and that's not the kind of crap we like to cough up.

Here instead is a list of ten state flags to run up the flagpoles of your worst enemies:

10. Nevada
This one is just frustrating. For a state seal, it's actually really well-composed: orderly, not too busy, pretty components. But then they went and tucked it in the upper left corner like they were trying to hide it. Move it to the center and this would be a top 15 flag.


9. South Dakota
North Dakota's flag kicks 12 kinds of ass, but South Dakota's is just pitiful; with that "Mount Rushmore State" slogan, their flag teeters close to advertising, as if Florida slapped "The Disney State" on their banner. It's almost impossible to see what's going on in that seal, but it's a picture of people mining, smelting and farming. Fun!


8. Oregon
What's this? A two-sided flag. Leave it to those Portland hipsters to salute vinyl LPs with their flag. But still we say: Make up your mind! Side A, with all the writing and crap, is lame. Side B, with the simple picture of a plump lil' beaver, is much better. Go with that one, vagina references be damned.



7. Ohio
The Nepal of U.S. flags; as with Nepal, it would look better as the standard for a cavalry brigade than anything else.


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Better than your "best" article. This shows more understanding of vexillological principles… but you got Alaska wrong. It's a good design- read up on the meaning.


The Union Jack on the Hawaii flat has nothing to do with the colonial period of the original 13 colonies, rather it is a result of Hawaii's own early history with the United Kingdom.


This cracked me up.  Thank goodness my birth state of Illinois wasn't on the list.


This x 1000.  But I was born and raised in Illinois, so I'm biased.

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