Blow Hard: Burzynski Gets Favorable Media Coverage

Categories: Spaced City
Stanislaw Burzynski
Media darling, Dr. Stanislaw Burzynski

​We were glad to see that Austin's FOX affiliate gave Dr. Stanislaw Burzynski -- you know, the doctor who cured cancer -- his second big Texas media blowjob of the month.

Houston's KHOU was first with a segment on Great Day Houston back in May. FOX Austin referred to him as a "pioneer" in "alternative medicine" and headlined its online story "Curing Cancer Without Chemotherapy."  KHOU's online copy trumpeted "Cutting Edge Cancer Treatment."

In fact, they spent so much time touting his cancer-bustin' that they didn't even have a chance to address the strides he's made battling that other Big C -- crow's feet. (Hey, it's only natural that, after conquering one of the nastiest terminal diseases in history, you go after mankind's next-biggest medical threat).

As far as we could tell, no one interrupted the fellatio by asking any irrelevant questions about clinical evidence, but maybe they were afraid of being called "a shit" -- after all, that's what happened to The Houston Press, when we opted to ask a few tough questions instead of just relaxing its throat muscles.

FOX's reporter at least stated that she tried to get oncologists to comment on Burzynski's miracle cure, but didn't get very far. The Press had a tough time getting oncologists to talk on record as well, which we didn't quite understand. But maybe it's just because they're all embarrassed for not having cured cancer first. Hell, they probably don't even know the first thing about wrinkles, either.

We did notice, though, that a relative of one of the patients in FOX's report talked about how much money doctors and pharmaceutical companies made off traditional cancer treatment, and how they're motivated by greed. We found that curious, because even though Burzynski's sitting on the cure for cancer and can allegedly heal an astonishing number of the people who come through his clinic's doors, he ain't giving his stuff away for free. Far from it.

Now just sit there and swallow.

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