Royal Wedding: The Five Hottest Royal Brides In History

Categories: Whatever

Hair Balls was positively ecstatic to learn that Prince William is getting hitched to longtime girlfriend Kate Middleton. Although the wedding isn't planned until 2011, we're already worrying over what to wear, and what to get the happy couple (we're pretty sure they'll register at Target). But in the meantime, we thought we'd look back upon some other notable royal brides. And by "notable," we mean "hot."

5) In 2004, Mary Donaldson became the Crown Princess of Denmark. She's not only exceptionally attractive, but she's also a member of the Royal Yacht Club of Tasmania! But that's not all -- her patronages include the Children's Aid Foundation, the Danish Association for Mental Health, and the vaguely pornographic-sounding Danish Stroke Association. 


4) Proving that you can still be attractive even if your nose is kind of big, Tatiana Blatnik married Prince Nikolaos of Greece and Denmark last August.


3.) One of the hottest royal brides ever, Grace Kelly was also one of the most talented. Before she married Prince Albert II of Monaco, she kicked ass in Rear Window, which is one of our favorite Hitchcock movies, and not just because it contains the word "rear."


2) Catherine of Valois, who looked stunningly like Emma Thompson, married Henry V in 1420. We dig Kenneth Branagh's 1989 version of this tragedy, which contains what many think is the best version ever of the St. Crispan's Day speech. Suck it, Olivier fans.


1) We're not sure if the marriage between Ann Darrow and King Kong, the greatest king of all, was official, or even consummated. The gorgeous actress was first offered up to the king as a sacrifice by the residents of Skull Island, but the big ape fell in love with her instead, making it one of the best meet-cute stories ever. Unfortunately, the king died before the couple could produce a Prince Kong. His body was shipped back to Skull Island for a funeral, where Kong's second cousin, Donkey, delivered the eulegy.


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