This Week In TV: Horrible, Horrible People

I'm recovered from the snow, I'm trying to convince people that "Dick in a Box" qualifies as Christmas music, and I've got a hole in my heart from eating batteries. This was the week in TV Land:

30 Rock was cute this week, though the bit about Frank turning into Liz was a little lifeless. But between Dr. Spaceman and the hi-def camera turning Jack into a Red October-era Alec Baldwin, it was still a winning episode. They pretty much all are.

• Did anybody else watch the first part of SighFie's Alice miniseries? Thoughts? (And what's with all the Alice stuff recently?) The second half airs tonight, and then it'll get rerun until the end of time.

Parks and Recreation was once again a showcase for Nick Offerman's Ron Swanson. His beeline for the breakfast buffet at the strip club was priceless, matched only by the simple joy on his face as he flipped pancakes to "Unskinny Bop." Seriously, NBC is dead air except for Conan and the two-hour Thursday comedy block.

• Adam Lambert got booked on The View, which is apparently like ZOMG GOOD NEWS or something, since he was booted from performing on ABC's Good Morning, America for being too gay for the before-work crowd. I have absolutely no opinion on this, since I don't care enough about Adam Lambert one way or the other.

• Yes, I watched Jersey Shore. Yes, I hated myself. It's interesting that MTV decided to remake The Real World with only one stereotype instead of seven, but whatevs. The guys are ripped and thuggish, the girls are faked and baked, and nobody's got an IQ above 60. These are horrible, horrible people, and I wish them all ill in their endeavors.

• Comcast bought a 51% stake in NBC Universal, so expect to see a lot more ads for E! network programming on NBC. Also, I think we're down to just Comcast and Google to see who takes over the world. I'm pulling for Google. Because for real, given the generally shitty nature of customer service at Comcast, I'm not too excited to see what happens when they get their hands on a major broadcast network and its related branches.

• Perhaps the most amazing thing about this video is that CBS is behind it. Faced with a couple of Christmas specials that could use more viewers, they made mash-ups of Frosty the Snowman with their own sitcoms to create web videos that are actually funny. So here to talk about his porn collection is Frosty the Inappropriate Snowman:

• Oh yeah, V is wrapped for the fall. So, yay?

Looking ahead to this week, A Charlie Brown Christmas airs Tuesday on ABC at 7 p.m. Central. If you miss it, they're running it again a week later, Dec. 15, at the same time. It's hands-down the best animated holiday special still airing, guaranteed to uplift you after setting the mood for half an hour with slowed-down jazz and a mournful children's choir. Record it and save it on your DVR to pull out next summer.

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