Longhorns Join The Undeserved-Victory Hall Of Fame

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The UT Longhorns will be playing in the BCS title game, thanks to a thoroughly undeserved win against Nebraska for the Big 12 championship, such as it is.

How badly did the Horns play? Against a completely mediocre Cornhusker team, the vaunted Horns offense was utterly stymied. QB Colt McCoy threw interceptions, the running game was stuffed, the team looked pathetic.

The only offense on the field that was worse was Nebraska's, which is understandable because Nebraska sucks. As opposed to being ranked Number Two in the nation.

Still, the Cornhuskers should have won. They somehow managed to kick a late field goal to take the lead. Then they kicked the ball out of bounds, giving UT prime field position, but still the Horns could only barely move into range for a winning FG. They tried one last play -- and with the clock running out, putative Heisman candidate McCoy dawdled around the backfield, leisurely strolling about, then lofted a punt-high pass 10 yards out of bounds that -- ever so barely, after a replay -- was determined to have hit the ground with one second left. UT then kicked the field goal.

If McCoy had thrown his idioitic pass just a bit higher, the Horns would have had time run out on them.

Their win joins an impressive list of Completely Undeserved Victories.

1. Dances With Wolves over GoodFellas.
Voters for the 1990 Oscars had a clear choice for Best Film -- an instant classic that would be still avidly watched 20 years later, or a bloated, sappy, boring star vehicle from someone whose career was about to enter a long, long slide. They chose unwisely.

2. Rick Perry for Governor, 2006.
Everyone in Texas was familiar with Rick Perry by 2006, and they decided they pretty much didn't like him. The incumbent couldn't even pull 40 percent of the vote in the election, which is as embarrassing as endless trips to the Holiday Bowl (see UT, bowl history of). Luckily for Perry, the field was so crowded with candidates that 39 percent was enough to win.

3. Pittsburgh winning the 1960 World Series.
The Yankees outscored the scrappy Pirates 54-27 in the seven games of the series, winning by such scores as 12-0, 10-0 and 16-3. The Pirates squeaked out a few victories, though, and then in Game Seven, in the bottom of the ninth, managed to get a walk-off home run from the perpetually light-hitting Bill Mazeroski. Sure, they beat the Yankees, which is always nice, but come on.

4. The Rebels blowing up the Death Star.

Granted, it took guts to fly in, but if the Empire had not decided to cut corners by using Exhaust Ports R Us, the Death Star is still floating around blowing up innocent planets.


5. The Hand of God. The 1986 World Cup quarter-final saw England play Argentina. Diego Maradona, the superstar from Argentina, scored a goal by just about catching the ball and shooting it like Michael Jordan. This is usually not allowed in soccer, but the refs opted not to call the blindingly obvious penalty. Argentina went on to win. Sure, they beat England, which is always nice, but still.



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