Why Notre Dame Will Win The BCS Title And Texas Won't: Part Nine
Today, though, we discuss why ND's road may be harder.
We have discovered, shockingly, that the pernicious influence of the KKK and other such anti-Catholic institutions have, sadly, not been relegated to the dustbin of history, as the kind of people who say "the dustbin of history" say.
Frankly, we thought this sort of discrimination had been dealt with when Joe Biden was elected to the vice-presidnecy. Apparently not.
How do we know this? Simply, the teams that have played Notre Dame -- and either have beaten them or lost to them -- have utterly fallen down on the job and allowed themselves to be beaten by inferior teams.
This weakens ND's strength of schedule, and hampers the ability of the Irish to claw their way up throuog the BCS rankings.
This is not the kind of America we thought we lived in anymore. But, fueled by a rare appearance by the mighty Pogues in town, we are willing to persevere in our weekly delineation of five reasons why ND will win the BCS title, even if the rest of the country is against them.
1. We saw ND live this weekend -- for the first time ever -- and, frankly, we found them unbeatable. A huge pep rally in front of the Alamo, San Antonio filled with friendly Irish fans acting classy -- if there's a God in heaven, he'll have ND winning the title. If ND doesn't....well, all you religious nuts are going to have to do some re-thinking.
2. Sure, Colt McCoy finally had a game where he didn't throw an interception. Congratulations. This was like Jeffrey Dahmer finally deciding to go a week without killing and eating someone. It's nice, but hey -- it's about time.
3. ND won easily despite every QB they have getting injured. Heisman Trophy favorite Jimmy Clausen had to leave the game. His backup, future Heisman Trophy favorite Dayne Crist, also got injured. Third-string QB Evan Sharpley, who is not a Heisman Trophy favorite only because he has the bad luck to be playing at the same time as Clausen and Crist, managed to finish the game without being carted off. ND still romped, against a team that was in the top 119 in college-football defenses.
4. UT plays the University of Central Florida this week, at 11 in the morning. Apparently a Tuesday-night game couldn't be scheduled.
5. Somehow, voters will look at the weak, weak schuedule UT plays and dock them for it. There's no anti-Catholicism involved here; it's just bad teams. If the BCS voters want to aggressively take steps to battle the ugly specter of religious bigotry, now's the time. Or, they can just sit back and take us all back to an ugly time where a man couldn't be eligible for a BCS championship the day he got himself baptized.