President Obama has nominated Sonia Sotomayor to replace David Souter on
the Supreme Court. Now begins the long and -- hopefully -- entertaining
confirmation process where we'll hear about her support of eugenics and
that one time in high school she smoked clove cigarettes behind the band
hall. As bad as that sounds, the President could've done a hell of a lot
5. Judge Arse -- Pink Floyd: The Wall (1982)
There's no place on the Supreme Court for a Justice who allows
themselves to be moved by emotional pleas and third-hand accounts that
are the equivalent of hearsay. Also, he's a giant butt.
4. Judge Reinhold (Judge Reinhold) -- Clerks: The Animated
Reinhold's rulings in Jay AKA The Letter "J" v. Quik Stop
Enterprises are just the sort of thing that get high-profile cases
thrown out on appeal. Luckily his mistakes were overshadowed by the
giant transforming robots and the surprise appearance of Tom Cruise.
3. The Magistrate (Hugh Griffith) -- Oliver! (1968)
It isn't the drinking that's the problem...truth be told, alcoholism was
a requirement for serving in Victorian-era courts. No, the magistrate
fails that most important of judicial litmus tests, grooming. Those
eyebrows, that beard...he even makes Scalia look well-kept.
2. Judge Dredd (Sylvester Stallone) -- Judge Dredd
Dredd's really more of a Bush guy, given his utter contempt for the 4th,
5th, 6th, and 8th Amendments. Besides, we've already got an Alito.
1. Judge Henry T. Fleming (John Forsythe) -- ...And Justice for
Jack Warden's ledge-dining, helicopter-piloting Judge Francis Rayford is
more well known, but Fleming is the guy blackmailing Arthur Kirkland (Al
Pacino) to defend him against rape charges after sending Kirkland's
innocent client to prison on a technicality. "Out of order" indeed.