This Just In: The Hand Center's Michael Brown Is Awesome

Categories: Spaced City
The Hand Center has sent out a press release saying medical license-loser Michael Brown is going to get a taste of his own medicine. No – no one’s going to beat him with a broken bedpost and kick him down the stairs. He’s going to undergo an operation on his own hand! Helluva story, really, but Business Wire should amend the headline to read “Prestigious Hand Surgeon, Philanthropist, Inventor, and Wife-Beater.” Why short-change the guy? (Come to think of it, we’re not too sure about “philanthropist,” either. Might want to change that to “drug-test-failer.”) -- Craig Malisow

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