Bald-Faced Guys: Hilton Koch and Sam Malone

Categories: Spaced City

We’ve just received word that Comets owner Hilton Koch is going to be on the Sam Malone Morning Show (Mix 96.5) this Friday, getting his head shaved to fulfill a promise he’d made to the Children’s Memorial Hermann Hospital Trauma Unit.

Koch agreed to shave his head (and Malone offered up his mustache) if the show raised $50,000 in donations, and, well, if you don’t know whether the goal was reached, you’re probably not very good at reading comprehension.

We here at Houstoned are itching to make a “shaved Koch” joke, but since he’s getting clipped for such a great cause, we’ll refrain. In fact, we’re so inspired by Koch’s upcoming on-air act that we’ve decided to make our own sacrifice online.

We’ve now placed a pinkie finger in a paper cutter. Too bad you can’t see it, but trust us, that digit sure looks precarious just sitting there. Yep, the lever could drop at any second. Whoosh! Oh, shit! The finger’s gone! The finger’s gone! There’s blood everywhere, people! My God! The horror! The horror!

Hey, whatever we can do for the kids. – Keith Plocek

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