R.I.P. Tim Tebow, The NFL Quarterback (April 22, 2010 - April 29, 2013)

teebow.jpg
Rex, Rex, why hast thou forsaken me?.
Judging by the tsunami level downpour of rain and hail along with the two-hour strobe light of lightning, it was around 3:30 p.m. Houston time on Saturday when the Jets officially decided to release football's former "chosen one," quarterback Tim Tebow.

They just chose to announce it publicly on Monday.

For it was Monday morning when the news came down that, after forfeiting a 4th round draft pick last season, $1.5 million in salary and eventually about $4 million to Denver to complete last year's trade, the Jets realized what every football fan with a brain, even Stephen A. Smith, had been already knew decided that the circus that came with Tebow, the thousands of sycophants thinking he was some sort of read option messiah, just wasn't worth the trouble anymore.

Seventy-seven offensive snaps. That's it, that's all the action Tebow saw in 2012, proving that Rex Ryan's hypothesis about using him "20 percent of the plays" was either a poor attempt at being coy or laughably inaccurate forecasting. Whatever the case, Tebow's failure in New York has multiple layers:

1. It means we can finally put to bed ridiculous arguments like the one below between Skip Bayless (the patron saint of ridiculous arguments) and Stephen A. Smith about Tebow's ability to win games in the NFL:

Keep in mind that there are literally dozens of YouTube clips like this one with Bayless verbally fellating Tim Tebow, but I chose this one because Bayless' entire argument as to why he's correct is that "Jon Gruden agrees with me!", as if Gruden doesn't make evaluation and assessment mistakes on a fairly frequent basis. What's even funnier is that Smith actually accepts Gruden's stamp of approval as an acceptable finishing move for Bayless' winning that battle in the quest for supremacy in the category of "inane Tebow-related arguments."

2. It means that Tebow screwed up royally in choosing to go to New York instead of going to Jacksonville. According to reports, when the trade went down last year, Tebow had final say over which team he would go to. For marketing reasons, he chose New York. Tough to market anything, though, when your entire gimmick is "polarizing, third-string quarterback." Conversely, if Tebow went to Jacksonville he would be the starter and own the town. Granted, he'd be the starter for a 2-14 team, and the town he would own would be, well, Jacksonville, but hey it would be better than getting kicked to the curb (I think).

3. As of right now, as long as Tebow insists on being a quarterback, some team in Canada is probably the favorite to land his services. If Tebow does find his way back into an NFL camp, it will likely be as some sort of an H-back or tight end.

This would mean we would all get a heaping helping of this...

....and I'm good with that.

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14 comments
Joey Hardwick
Joey Hardwick

The man does great work off the field no doubt. I don't care about his religious beliefs or public 'Tebowing'. As an NFL quarterback his throwing mechanics are horrible. He found success in Denver but not in NY. Who's to say he won't find success again elsewhere. He's a team's gamble, and not one I'd want to my hometown team to take.

Keith Eckert
Keith Eckert

Beating the Pittsburgh steelers in the playoffs with a pass!!!!!!!!!!!

Mike Trotter Jr.
Mike Trotter Jr.

Rotflmao. I'm about as afraid of Christians and that I might be going to hell as I am afraid that I might be molested by a Sasquatch.

David Rozycki
David Rozycki

Matthew 6:5 And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites are: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

Sampson Simpson
Sampson Simpson

lol@afraid of christians ... dont believe in hell so im not that scared

Barry Atkins
Barry Atkins

People are so afraid of Christians. When they see one who's famous or accomplished they immediately start tearing him down to cover up the fear that they may be going to he'll. Its a pretty pathetic trait done people have. The press all but felates the felons and murderers who are in the NFL, but can't wait to find some joy in a good Christian man who's gotten a raw deal in the league. IMO we haven't seen the last of Tebow as a starter in the NFL

Nikki Smith
Nikki Smith

My favorite moment is right now. This moment.

Robish
Robish

You really don't think some desperately quarterback-challenged team will bring him to camp to compete for the job? There are so many out there, I think it's a possibility. But in this case, Tebow took some bad advice from God and his agent(s). Should have gone to Jacksonville. He could have been a big fish in a little pond that was predisposed to love him regardless of how productive he was.

gossamersixteen
gossamersixteen topcommenter

So is every other self respecting football fan, good riddance...

Rudyard
Rudyard

I've never understood any athlete that voluntarily signs with the Jets. The fans patience wore out a long time ago and the media is brutal. Giants fans are a bit more forgiving due to recent success. Tebow blew it by going to NY and now his career may never recover. His only option might be a year or two in the CFL, but he would have to really prove himself to make it back to a team in the lower forty eight.

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