Mark Sanford Needs to Shut Up and Get the Hell Away from the Alamo

Categories: Texas

Mark_Sanford,_Congressional_photo.jpg
You were awful before, and you are awful still.
Former South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford stands as one of the largest piles of schadenfreude most political observers have recently seen. Traipsing the Appalachian Trail, chasing some Argentinian tail along the way, accused of trespassing by his ex-wife -- it was one of the most enjoyable political rides we'd seen in some time. And it was completely deserved.

Anyway, for those who haven't heard, Sanford's attempting to make a comeback, this time as a Congressman in the Palmetto State. (You may have heard a few things about Stephen Colbert's sister making a run at Congress. This is her opponent.) And in case there isn't enough fodder for the Democratic camp -- in case this attack ad wasn't the most devastating you've seen in years -- Sanford decided to pen a full-page letter detailing, among other things, why his plight is parallel to that of those who fought in the Alamo -- nearly 30 years after Texas won its revolution.

After detailing why the former officeholder had just, oh, man, like the hardest week of anyone in the country -- two points for timing, governor! -- Sanford sums up why his stand against the Democratic Tyrants is akin to the battle set before South Carolinian William Travis as the Mexican army trundled toward the Alamo:

I will leave you with one last thought. In March of 1863, there was similarly little time. A South Carolinian by the name of William Travis drew a line in the sand with his sword and simply asked those who would stay and fight, to cross it. His efforts, and that of those who died with him there at the Alamo, ultimately inspired Texans to come to the aid of their brethren and defeat Santa Anna's army though they were outnumbered at the onset by six to one. I'm outnumbered right now, but will fight to the end toward freedom and financial sanity in Washington to sustaining it. I'd ask you to cross the line and fight with me.
First, and speaking at the presumptive behest of Texans everywhere, go to hell, Mr. Sanford. South Carolina has any one of a litany of revolutionary themes and motifs you can draw on. (Hey, look! Fort Sumter! Hey there!) The Alamo belongs to Texas, and to America. It does not belong to South Carolina's First Congressional District. Don't taint our grounds with your presence.

Moreover, if you're going to co-opt our history, Sanford, the least you could do would be to get the friggin' date correct. Because while you were busy traipsing Buenos Aires instead of reading up on your Texian Army history, you apparently missed the note that the pitch surrounding the Alamo took place in 1836, not 1863. You built your entire pitiful, woe-is-me screed around the imagery of the Alamo -- and then dropped our most noted battle in the middle of the Civil War. If the voters of South Carolina don't keep you out for your thoroughly detailed record of deceit, at least they could, on behalf of Texans everywhere, keep you out for daring to screw with our Alamo.

(h/t TPM)


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16 comments
Noelle A. Perry
Noelle A. Perry

we won't judge SC by its crazy politicians if you won't judge texas by ours. :)

Noelle A. Perry
Noelle A. Perry

use the term "public sector" very loosely, as they do not actually serve the public in any way, shape, or form.

Jeff Turner
Jeff Turner

I moved to Houston from SC 11 years ago and I am soooo embarrassed by this buffoon. Please don't judge all S.Carolinians by this joke of a man. I promise there are some people with sense that live there.

ltrasczak
ltrasczak

As a VERY Conservative Republican who detests pretty much everything the Democratic Party stands for... I can NOT agree with your article more.   My only complaint here is that you are far to easy the disgraceful waste of DNA that calls itself Mark Sanford.    I am not just embarrassed by the fact Sanford decided he was a member of my party... I'm embarrassed by the fact Sanford is a member of my species.  Pretty much everything that stands upright, and several species of lichen, are disgusted by the fact they are forced to share this planet with Mark Sanford.


Erin Lucas
Erin Lucas

Why do people like this CONTINUE to return to politics, instead of seeking less public employment? As if the ONLY jobs that matter to these egomaniacs is the public sector?

DavyCrockett
DavyCrockett

That gentleman needs an ass whooping. How dare he besmirch the sacred grounds of my death. Truthfully, though, the swine in question and Travis (god rest his soul) have womanizing ways in common.

gospurs927
gospurs927

Best thing you've ever written, Casey.

MadMac
MadMac topcommenter

Agreed. Know what I'll be tweeting when I'm off Uncle Sugar's dime.

TexasMade5717
TexasMade5717

@gospurs927 Agreed...You get to keep your job for another week :p

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