Michael Brown: Whoops -- I Didn't Really Mean to File for Bankruptcy After Buying That $8 Million Mansion!
As if the clusterfuck of multi-jurisdictional litigation involving wife-beater and alleged flight-attendant-choker Michael "I Did Not Give That Woman Anal Herpes" Brown is not crazy enough, the former TV-ad icon is seeking to dismiss his bankruptcy filing in a Miami federal court.
Apparently, Brown accidentally filed a motion for bankruptcy when what he really meant to do was file a motion to snort coke off a stripper's ass.
Avid Brown-watchers will remember that, a few weeks after federal prosecutors accused him of choking flight attendants and threatening to demonstrate the Patented Brown Dick-Dangle, and a month after he shattered local real-estate records by buying an $8 million beachfront palace with a fucking movie theater, Brown filed for Chapter 11 protection.
Because that's what people do. But Brown last week filed a last-minute motion claiming that his filing was a mistake, his estranged wife's a gold-digging beyatch and all he's trying to do is amicably settle his Harris County divorce proceedings.
Meanwhile, lawyers for a group of doctors working for a Brown-controlled company have filed a motion accusing Brown of bleeding so much money from one of his Houston-based companies that it won't be able to pay its bills in six months.
Here's the deal: The doctors in that case, which was filed in a Texas federal court, were looking forward to the possibility of the Miami bankruptcy judge putting Brown's companies into receivership, just so everyone can figure out, once and for all, what kind of financial shell game the ex-surgeon has been playing.
According to the doctors' filing opposing the withdrawal of bankruptcy, the chief financial officer of Brown's company, Surgeon's Management Inc., stated in a deposition that "given the immense amount of cash that [Brown] has pulled out of his business in the past year, SMI has no more than six months left until it can no longer pay its bills."
Hair Balls must say that Charles Cave's candor is a refreshing about-face from his robot-like non-testimony in Brown's divorce case, in which he repeatedly took the Fifth Amendment under intense grilling by Rachel Brown's attorney. (The attorney, David Brown -- no relation -- was trying to figure out whether Brown was siphoning $17,000 in cash a day from SMI.)