The Sports Hall of Shame, an Idea Long Overdue

OJ's bronco hangs from the ceiling like the Spirit of St. Louis.

A week or so ago, you may remember, I wrote a post about the auction for Bobby Petrino's crash-damaged motorcycle. The majority of the post was an outline of my idea to turn the crumpled-up love machine into a profit center by selling photo opportunities for fans to pose on the bike.

At the end of the post, I wrote the following:

This needs to happen. And once the "posing on the bike" novelty has worn off, we can move the bike to the Hall of Shame that I plan on opening someday. Yes, someday I envision there being a building where artifacts from the sports world that symbolize scandal, scumbaggery and soul-crushing defeat are all gathered and are able to be viewed museum-style. The place would crush, trust me.

But the Hall of Shame, that's another idea for another post.

Well, this is that post.

Most people love to travel, and sports fans generally like the historical aspect of their favorite sports. The concept of a "Hall of Fame" in each sport is built on those two consumption patterns. Whether it's Cooperstown, New York, for baseball, Canton, Ohio, for football, or Springfield, Massachusetts, for basketball, fans of those sports have spent decades making the pilgrimage to each of those places so they can reminisce and/or learn about their favorite pastimes.

There's only one problem. By and large, these hallowed halls accentuate the positives of each sport, the do-gooders, the truly great. Whether by design or not, the fact of the matter is that you come away from each of these places with a happy, flowery image of each sport soaked into your brain.

Now, one trip to the headlines section of any sports Web site is enough to shock you back into reality and remind you that, whether we like it or not, much of what shapes the sports world is actually spawned from scandal, defeat and, yes, even death. My contention is that we need a building that specifically houses artifacts and reminders of the imperfections and blights on the sports world.

Hence, my idea of the Hall of Shame.

It's a concept that I've espoused privately to some friends for some time; the auction of the Petrino skank cycle merely gave me the impetus to discuss it openly on the radio and in this space. As for broad strokes on location and concept, obviously a house celebrating sin like this one would need to be erected in Sin City, so Vegas, congrats! You're the home of my Hall of Shame!

With alcohol being the source of so many poor decisions in the sports world, I think it's only fitting that drinks are available frequently throughout the facility, so beer tubs at every corner manned by lookalikes of some of sports' most infamous females are also a must (Kim Kardashian, Jessica Simpson pre-kid, Anna Benson, to name a few).

Naturally, my listeners decided to weigh in with items and features that they would like to see displayed, so I'll give the floor to them to begin the process of stocking display cases and building content-specific wings on this bad boy.

Don't miss the JaMarcus Russell exhibit!

Here we go (Twitter handles in parentheses, if you want to give any of these tweeps a follow; also, my comments are preceded by a bold "SP:"):

Aggie Doug ‏(@AggieDoug) -- Evander Holyfield's ear lobe
Todd Faber ‏(@barnztormre) -- Amare's fire extinguisher, a Hooters receipt signed by John Daly, and a gallon of purple drank signed by Jamarcus Russell.
Tony in Albuquerque ‏(@MastTerBase) -- Marv Alberts Victoria 's secret values shopper card
Scott Smith ‏(@alpacinoswig) -- Mike Price's strip club tab

SP: Starting to see a recurring theme? People want to see receipts or copies of tabs from scandalous figures or events. A wing or book of all of these is certainly a possibility. Other items in this category would be the receipt from the night Tony Larussa got a DWI, any Carlos Lee receipt from Golden Corral and the receipt from any night that Josh Hamilton fell off the wagon.

Tim Haraden ‏(@TimHaraden) -- Larry Eustachy red solo cup

SP: I believe you mean his Natty Light can.

Cody Stoots ‏(@Cody_Love) -- a collage of Cromartie's kids birth certificates

SP: The first of several Antonio Cromartie submissions, the volume of which was enough to consider giving Cromartie his own traveling show, like the King Tut exhibit that travels the country from museum to museum.